#this isn’t the most well written thing but it’s more for me than anything lol
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snail-berry · 1 year ago
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My whole life I’ve felt like I’m never enough of something to fit in to a group/community. I’m non-binary but I present very femininely so most people assume I’m a woman which I was ok with at the time. I’m Jewish but I was raised Catholic and sent to catholic school (my parents were told it would be a better education) so I am not as educated as I’d like to be (but I have been learning) and I don’t fit in with my Jewish family as much nor did I ever fit in with my Catholic classmates as I was always “the Jewish one”. I’m fat but until recently I was in between sizes where I still got ridiculed for being fat and doctors told me losing weight would fix all my problems but was never fat “enough” to fit into a community or have support. Overall, I was too much or not enough to fit in with my peers in some way or another.
So, I tried to be “normal” and fit in with my classmates or friends but it never worked. Trying to be straight and cis did not make me straight or cis and trying to be thin did not make me thin, it made me miserable and self conscious and have disordered eating and hate myself for being the way I am. I have never been able to fit in with others and finding out I’m probably autistic has explained part of that but Ive always felt like I’m either too much or never enough for everyone I’ve ever met and it makes just being me so hard.
In recent years, I’ve become the kind of person who is unapologetically myself because for so long I completely hid who I was to try to fit in with these communities. I tried to be cis, I tried to be “Catholic” and hide that I was Jewish (which is hard with a very Jewish last name haha), I tried to lose weight and dress in ways that made me appear thinner so I could be “normal”. But becoming unapologetically myself has been something that has made me so much more confident and happy with myself and my life. I’ve never gotten more compliments than when I dyed my hair or when I wear outfits that don’t hide my body. I’ve gotten a partner who loves and accepts me for who I am and stopped being friends with people who didn’t support me as I am. I express myself how I feel comfortable doing so and while I still face homophobia and fatphobia and lots of judgements from others I am becoming who I want to be and that has made me so much happier.
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kisseobie · 7 months ago
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piwons favourite positions? 😋
p1harmony’s favorite positions
pairings: ot6 p1harmony x reader
warnings: nsfw (mdni)
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a/n: i could have sworn that i had written this before because it’s such a common smut prompt but i guess i haven’t?? anyways enjoy :P i included some oral positions as well lol
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౨ৎ keeho
full nelson, lotus
kyo has a bit of a strength kink (i know yall saw he said in a gov ball interview that his summer goal is to get buffer), and his aura as a leader extends to the bedroom as well. loves fucking you in full nelson—with your back against his chest, legs propped up, and body in his full control. loves how the position makes it impossible for you to do anything but take his girthy cock, and how it’s sure to have you babbling and brainless. if he’s feeling a bit more romantic, however, the lotus position is his go-to. makes him feel incredibly close to you. loves to cradle your face and stare into your eyes as he slowly ruts his hips into yours <3
౨ৎ theo
butterfly, facesitting
you can’t convince me that taeyang isn’t a lover of women’s legs. whether their height is accentuated with red stiletto heels, or they are covered with fishnet stockings, he’s always had a secret affection for legs. in the butterfly position, he’s able to slam into you at whatever pace he likes, whilst your legs are hoisted up in the air, making them so easily accessible to his wet kisses. just imagine theo pounding into your heat and keeping eye contact with you as he kisses up your leg… oh and we all know theo is a munch. would love having your pussy sat on his face even more than you :P
౨ৎ jiung
missionary, spooning
a sucker for eye contact and sweet intimacy. jiung is nothing but a service top—if you exclude the time he got jealous of the attention you got at a party he dragged you to and fucked you mercilessly in his backseat—so it goes without saying that he’d love fucking into you in missionary. allows him to really look at you and hear your every hitched breath. tucks his head into your neck and groans when he’s coming in you, and the scent of your hair eases him back onto earth. ji also loves spoon fucking you when you both are sleepy but still want to be intimate .. the closeness of it makes him insane. grunts a lot into your ear and plants kisses on the back of your neck :3
౨ৎ intak
doggy style, reverse cowgirl
intak’s favorite positions have gotta be the most obvious. being true to his puppy-self, he almost always has you in doggy style, with tak standing up with his feet planted on the floor, and your ass up on the edge of the bed. the way your ass jiggles every time he plows into your pussy only makes him more desperate… oh and he loves to fold into you, with his chest leaning over your frame when he’s about to come. if he’s feeling more needy, he’s begging you to ride his dick in reverse cowgirl—and yes, his hands will always find home on your ass
౨ৎ soul
against the wall (no idea what this is called), 69
loves feeling in control, and being desperate and messy really gets him going… i can’t not fantasize about shota fucking you against a wall, maybe even his dorm room door. whether he’s eating you out against it, or has you lifted into the air, with him bouncing you up and down his length.. he lovessss the dirty feeling of fucking you somewhere a little more untraditional than a bed. and of course, 69 with shota is something i’ve mentioned before.. but i genuinely think he’d be so enthusiastic about it. would make silly “who’ll cum faster” competitions out of it too :O
౨ৎ jongseob
cowgirl, g-whiz
oh jongseob loves a good ride, loves the view of your head thrown back, cunny gushing against his dick, and tits jiggling in front of his face. would beg you to ride him nearly every time the pair of you decide to have sex.. he’s just obsessed with it. his favorite thing to do when your riding him cowgirl style is to grab at your hips and plow up into you, and your surprised reaction makes him laugh out loud every time. when he’s wanting to be a bit more in control, he pushes you onto your back and crawls on top of you, grabbing your legs and propping them up onto his shoulders, the heavenly position making both of your eyes roll back from how deep he feels inside…. i’m fucking crazy
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taglist: @woozixo @hearts4chanhee @kyokopi @astro-doll-the-star @soobiary @kyaaramello @t3ssamoodboard @angelcbf @idontknow-1s-world @vivienne-sim @elissasimp @imjustayapper @ihatewreckingballmains @sosaverse @seobing @www90kitsch @khfviq @barbiekh86t @bbyjjunie @taeyangi @fullsunstrawberry @jihnyah @intheemptymirror @watamotee33 @dreamer1299 @jixnnsie @wonootnoot @yukx-x047 @sundancearchives @chuuswifereal @seisyiss @fishsquishh @sunnyyangie @asianpenguin04
© kisseobie, please do not repost my writing!
౨ৎ ₊˚𓂃ᡴꪫ
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paperultra · 1 year ago
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the liminal space.
Pairing: OPLA!Roronoa Zoro x Reader Word Count: 1,575 words Warnings: Swearing, mentions of alcohol use [A/N: written with the cooper!reader from mise en rose in mind. i don't know where in the timeline this occurs, though. lol.]
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cingulomania (noun): a strong desire to hold a person in your arms
Living in close quarters can really change how you see a person.
Roronoa Zoro, for instance, had always struck you as rather aloof, having traveled alone for some time before you joined him, and unused to physical affection. He never gave any indication that he was one to enjoy it, and he never sought it out from anyone. That certainly wasn’t odd. You respected his tendency towards personal space, subsequently believing that it extended to his sleeping habits as well.
So when you wake up, hardly able to breathe underneath the hulking mass of a snoring swordsman, you are more surprised than anything.
“Zoro,” you wheeze, patting his back with the hand that isn’t crushed between his chest and yours. Nothing happens, so you swat harder. “Zoro. You’re crushing me.”
His arms squeeze around you as he stirs, inhaling sharply next to your ear. You stop moving as he lifts his head and opens his eyes just wide enough to register you beneath him.
He pauses.
Good morning, sunshine is what you want to say in a cheeky tone. You want to prove that you’re unaffected by the warmth of his body pressing yours into the mattress, the sensation of his breath across your cheekbone and the way his gaze transitions from something bleary into something sharp.
The greeting refuses to leave your mouth. All you can do is blink.
The next thing you know, Zoro’s rolling off of you and out of bed with nary an apology, mumbling something about going to the bathroom.
You hum distantly in response and stare up at the ceiling as he shuffles to the door. Once he closes it behind him, you reach up and fold your hands over your eyes, cheeks hot.
Great.
It all started because you and Zoro could only afford a single bed at the inn.
(You use the term “afford” loosely here. The truth of the matter is that you grossly underestimated how much a room would cost, and the owner of the one place willing to lend you a room for half the usual rate demanded physical labor to make up for the rest. Given that Zoro would be spending most of his time hunting down a bounty, the majority of the unpaid labor fell on your shoulders.)
(But you digress.)
The room is small and bare, which is fine, because you and Zoro don’t have much between the two of you anyway. The only problem is that there is only one bed. Zoro had expressed no qualms about sharing so long as you didn’t disturb his sleep, and you had readily agreed, not wanting either of you to sleep on the floor.
After the first morning, you’re not sure if that was a lapse of judgement on your part or not.
Zoro doesn’t mention it at all before he leaves for the day, and you don’t, either. However, when he comes back in the middle of the night and you’re already in bed, squinting and shielding yourself from the bright hallway light as he takes his slippers off and walks in, he sits on the carpet just a few feet away from your side.
“What are you doing?” you ask as he proceeds to lay down.
“Sleeping.”
He closes his eyes and folds his arms behind his head. You frown.
“Why aren’t you sleeping up here?” No answer. You lift your head from your pillow, indignant. “Hey, don’t ignore me! I know you’re still awake.”
“I’ve had a long day,” he grumbles, “so I’d like some quiet so I can sleep. Thanks.”
You huff.
The thought that Zoro might actually be just as embarrassed flits briefly through your mind, but you extinguish it just as quickly. He’s never seemed like the kind of guy to be self-conscious about those kinds of things. A more likely reason is that he’s decided that he wants his own separate space after all and can’t be bothered to kick you off the bed.
So, you kick yourself off instead.
“What are you doing?” The phrase now comes from Zoro as you throw the covers off and grab your pillow, kneeling on the ground beside him. His eyes open and his brow furrows.
“Take the bed. I feel guilty.”
“I don’t want the bed.”
“Everybody wants the bed.” You lie down on the carpet and cross your arms over your chest, stubborn. “I’ve already slept in it. Now it’s your turn.”
“You’re an idiot,” Zoro says.
Neither of you budge.
The next morning, you decide that the first morning was in fact not a fluke, as you awake with your face smushed against his chest and the smell of steel in your nose once again. He’s not on top of you, at least, but the way he clutches you while you’re lying on your side, one ankle hooked over yours, is somehow ten times more mortifying. You wake him up in the midst of untangling yourself and pretend like nothing happened.
Who’s the idiot now? (The answer is both of you. Both of you are idiots.)
The third night, you and Zoro flop onto the hard mattress with twin groans, heads spinning and feeling overall miserable.
“That was the shittiest booze I’ve ever had,” Zoro slurs next to you, face down in his pillow.
“But you got a lead, right?” you mumble.
“Yeah …”
You had been there in the bar when he’d gotten that lead, but you can’t remember what it was for the life of you. Another inn? Another bar? Ugh, you’re never drinking there again.
“I’m cold.”
There are blankets on the bed. Unfortunately, getting underneath them would require a lot of moving, and you are physically incapable of exerting yourself that much right now.
You shiver and turn onto your side to curl up. You’ll fall asleep at some point, anyway.
Zoro murmurs your name.
“Hm,” you groan, eyes screwed shut.
He doesn’t say anything in reply. But you hear the mattress squeak, the bedsheets rustle as he shifts closer, and your breath catches when the small distance between you closes. He does not wrap his arms around you, no, but your knees touch, and the heat from his skin melds into yours. You hear his breathing slow to a crawl.
Through your drunken haze breaks through a sudden need to draw him into you, to tuck your face into his neck and keep it there forever. You want – you want. But you’re exhausted, and your head aches, so you find yourself slipping into a deep slumber instead.
He’s already gone when you wake up.
A suspiciously lumpy gunnysack in the corner of the room catches your eye once you enter, hand over your mouth to stifle a yawn.
“What’s in the bag?”
“Eight million beri,” Zoro says from his seat on the bed. Cleaning supplies for his swords are strewn around him, and he sheathes the Wado Ichimonji as you close the door. “I ran into another bounty on the way back.”
“Eight mill –” You clear your throat. “Wow. That was pretty lucky.” Eight million beri. Sometimes you wonder if you’ll ever get used to how much bounty hunters can make. (God, that would’ve been more than enough to pay for the room.) “We’re heading out to a marine base tomorrow morning, then?”
“That’s the plan.”
He puts away his supplies, setting them and his swords against the wall near his pillow before standing up to pull down the sheets on his side. You turn off the bedside lamp and do the same, crawling in with a sigh.
The two of you simply lie side-by-side until you decide to break the silence with your big mouth again.
“Am I a burden to you?” you ask.
“No.” The plainness of Zoro’s tone is a small comfort, you suppose. “Why are you asking?”
“Well …” You already regret bringing this topic up as you trail off, biting your bottom lip. “I feel like I haven’t really done much. I mean, I help with navigating and searching crowds and stuff, and I’ve been getting better at fighting, but I can’t help you, you know?” You fiddle with your fingers. “You don’t actually need me.”
There’s a gap between you and Zoro that you’ll likely never be able to close. You had always known that, and so had Zoro; in fact, he had told you at the start that going with him was a bad idea, given your inexperience in bounty hunting and traveling in general. And although you’d like to think that your ability to read a map and fix things convinced him of your usefulness, there are times when you think Zoro regrets bringing you along. Like now.
Zoro grunts, turning to lay on his back. His shoulder nearly lands on your hands, and you draw them to yourself as you wait for his answer.
It is brief and straightforward.
“I’m not forcing you to go with me,” he says. “And if you were a burden, I would’ve told you a long time ago.”
“Oh.”
It is brief and straightforward, and yet, there’s a strange lump in your throat. You swallow it and nod, even though he cannot see you do so.
Nothing more is said. However, as the night goes on, you reach out, and you find him, and Zoro finds you, and the space between your arms fills up with warmth and an unspoken promise. And you sleep very well.
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jayden-killer · 1 year ago
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FOR US.
(Loki x fem! Reader)
summary: A friend of Loki knocks at your house door, with the intention to tell you Loki's last words to you.
warnings: SPOILERS FROM LOKI SEASON 2 FINALE, very long one shot, other than that, no more warnings, this is so sad lol.
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"On the coast, temperatures will drop sharply, dropping from eleven to four degrees, especially after the sunset. Now, let’s move on to the inner side..."
The weatherman’s voice came from the TV in the living room, but to me, it was distant since I was focused on unpacking the shopping bags on my kitchen island. The cold dyed my cheeks a light purple, although I had access to the heating in the house for a few minutes. A few sunbeams were seeping through the curtains, illuminating my face, and I was checking that you hadn’t forgotten anything from my shopping list. And yet, even though I was busy, there was a small part of me that felt like something bad was going to happen. As if my sixth sense was warning me that something inexplicable was coming. Almost as if it were fate to give me the answer rang the bell at my front door. I picked up the remote next to me of the TV, turned it off, and gently left it on the couch, then went to open it to whoever was behind my door. The moment you opened it, a gentleman appeared to me to be middle-aged, with grizzled hair and a short moustache. Despite his rather well-groomed appearance, the lines on his face were noticeable, showing his age. And he definitely had tired eyes. I looked at him reluctantly, waiting for him to talk; actually, I did it first. "Hi? Can I... do something for you?"
He breathed in air and glanced at me, not with disgust but rather with curiosity. He asked if my name was what he actually knew, which was later confirmed by me. Then he answered with a half-forced smile and a subtle voice: "I’m sorry if I show up here, out of nowhere, without even introducing myself. Call me Mobius," he clarified, giving me a handshake."I am here for a specific reason. It's forLoki".
My heart sank when I heard Loki’s name spoken. It couldn’t be good. Loki would have come in person if it was important.
Why wasn’t he there?
Why was there this Mobius instead?
Did Loki pull one of his tricks again and caused more chaos than he did in the past?
Once again, my sixth sense did not betray me.
~
"Tea?"
"Oh, no, thank you".
"Not even a piece of cake? It’s fresh, I bought it just this morning".
"I can not say no to such a good piece of cake. I gladly accept." Mobius' laugh was short, but it was effective in bringing back a smile on that concerned face that I had shown since he told me he was here with precise intentions. Now, he was sitting in my living room, on the leather sofa that Loki himself adored, since his butt never wanted to leave it. "So..." I began the conversation, handing the strawberry cake plate to Mobius, who thanked me with a silent thank you. He took a bite of it and showed with pleasure that the dessert was good. I sat in front of him, rubbing the sweaty palms of my hands on my jeans. One of my legs bounced back and forth, clearly anxious. "You said it was about Loki. What’s going on?"
Mobius cleared his voice, placing next to him the dish of cake now devoured, and assumed a different expression; he seemed tense, as if finding the words for what he was going to tell me was the most complicated thing in the world. I bit my lip. The wait was slowly killing me inside.
"Loki... well, he..." He breathed, looking down. "You know what he was doing at TVA?"
"Yes" My answer was hasty. I needed to know what had happened to my partner.
"What about his past?"
"I know everything. What happened? Why isn’t he here, Mobius?"
He took a very deep breath, and closed his eyes slightly, looking away. He placed a hand on the inside of his jacket, pulling a paper bag from an inner pocket. He handed it to me, and I immediately noticed the details: the recipient and the sender were written with, surely, an handwriting well taken care of; of course the ink was a fountain pen, because no one else would recognize that writing so elegant. It was Loki’s. A letter from Loki. And judging by the content, there was also an object inside it.
"What does that mean?" I didn’t want Loki to leave me. Not again. My voice cracked in pain, and I felt a tingle in my eyes. Mobius took my hand, holding it tightly. As if to say that he was there to console me, but that the worst was yet to come.
"Loki is...he is now 'He who remains'. The one who watches over time. On all the timelines of all time. He is...like a new time keeper".
The pieces of the puzzle were slowly coming together and everything seemed clearer when he confessed to me. My gaze wavered from the envelope to Mobius' broken face. He sympathized me, it was clear, but how could you not pity a lover who had definitely lost, this time, his other half.
"He holds all the time lines together. His role is extremely important, because if it weren’t for him, we wouldn’t...you wouldn’t be here." I looked at him with tears in my eyes. His breathing was accelerating. He hadn’t finished. There was something else he had to reveal to me.
"Before he sacrificed himself for the sake of time, for his friends, for you... he told me to give you this." His gaze fell on the letter. "Then he closed the underground doors leading to the tunnel, and looked at me and Sylvie."
"Sylvie..." The name reminded me of someone he previously told me about. "Her other variant, right?"
He nodded. "He told us that now he knew who he would become. What God would he be. And he thanked you for taking care of him when he was still a dangerous man, a threat to others." He paused briefly. Even his voice seemed to waver for a second. " That’s it. And he disappeared in the next few minutes."
How much information in one speech.
How many things I would have to process in my mind before I accepted the harsh and harsh truth.
How many thoughts buzzed in my head as a result of that shocking revelation.
It was like a truck hitting you in the chest, throwing your powerless body into the road.
"He won't come back anymore, will he?"
Mobius never stopped holding my hand for a moment, holding it even tighter in his rough palm. He understood that he too had a strong hope of Loki’s return. Surely he had been a close friend of his, one who had been close to him all along. So why didn’t he tell me about it before?
However, his silence mk was from confirmation: he wanted, as much as me, his return, but how many were high hopes?
Would it have happened that, one day, a morning like this, he would have appeared at the door of my house, he would have knelt down and embraced me grieving?
How many years from now?
"We don’t know for sure." That sentence brought me up. I dried with my fist closed the tears that threatened to flow from my eyes, as a child does when she feels that maybe her mother would never return to her. I couldn’t stand the idea that I wouldn’t have Loki around me anymore.
Without adding any more, Mobius let go of my hand, standing up and glancing at the letter I held in my other palm. It was a silent way of saying he would give me some privacy to read the letter. So, he walked to the kitchen, bringing with him the plate with the leftover cake.
My hands were shaking. I didn’t have the courage to see what was inside. I was hoping it was another one of his planned pranks. Maybe confetti and a snake would come out, and he would hiss and say, "I fooled you again!"
I tore the opening of the envelope very gently and put a flickering hand inside. I had a cold feeling. Something hard and small was inside. It was..
"A ring.."
A beautiful silver ring.
Tears immediately came back to me. The small object landed in the palm of my hand, the hiccups made its way into my throat, and I squeezed it tightly against my chest. I couldn’t do it.
This was too much for my weak heart.
Was that the real pain?
Was that how you felt?
I still had to read his letter. I didn’t mentally have the strength to do it. It required a huge effort. Only some time later I had the courage to open that letter that was delivered to me by Mobius.
A/N: NOW, my fellow readers, would you like to know what Loki has written in that letter ✉️? Because I've assured you, it's gonna be much sad than this one short.👀
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koinotame · 9 months ago
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boob windows. that's it that's the fic
word count: 1.1K content warnings: this is meant to be yandere au and sagau/self aware au so uh. hint of that, but mostly just crack. nothing Super Nsfw but the whole thing is raunchy and suggestive humour
characters included: mostly ei, but childe, kaeya and briefly zhongli also make an appearance with some others mentioned
a/n: this is a repost (slightly edited)! this was on my to-edit-&-repost list for a while now and this seemed like a good day to do so lol. alas this was originally written before the sumeru release so while editing there wasn't really an opportunity for me to add in wriothesley apparently out-butting zhongli or lyney's tigh high garters and i only just realised kaveh could technically also count here so uh. forgive me. i'll write something for them some day
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"is… is everything alright, your grace?"
you loudly suck up another boba pearl, not moving your gaze from where it’s been lodged the past several minutes. "mm, everything’s fine."
ei fidgets in front of you, the cup held tightly in her hands still almost full. she looks unsure, but decides that she knows better than to question you. "if you say so."
it’s clear this isn’t what she had in mind when she personally came to see you instead of sending the raiden shōgun to greet and attend to you. the one time she comes out of her plane, all you’re seemingly doing is ignoring all table manners and gawking at her chest.
yes, that’s right, you’re ogling her chest. or, more accurately, you’re ogling her tiddy window.
between her and kaeya, she’s showing off much more chest. but then kaeya knows what he’s doing, while ei just seems to have it there for convenience over aesthetic…
you squint at her while you get lost in thoughts, and ei’s fidgeting intensifies.
ah shit. you forgot about itto. he wins in terms of who shows off their chest the most, you guess. he’s even wearing that… you’re not sure what to call it but tit belt fits well enough. anyway, the tit belt accentuates his pecs very, very nicely, although they do hide his nips from sight. alas.
you suppose gorou and cyno also exist, but they don’t have the same appeal. oh, and navia and la signora, but both of them are just wearing a sleeveless, collarless dress, so you’re not sure that counts either.
but then by that argument, does itto count? he’s not even wearing a shirt. cyno isn’t wearing a shirt either. and what gorou has is more of a tummy window than anything… but he does have that little window?
between gorou and childe, gorou is definitely winning though. you’d apologise for slandering your poor ajax but between the little triangle he shows off and gorou’s entire tummy out… you’re not sorry. though… there’s something to be said about a small slither of skin inviting you to stick your hands into that gorou having his whole tummy out doesn’t have.
wait, wait. you just had a genius idea. actually, two.
first of all, zhongli with a tiddy window… you are considering. then again, you guess his biggest asset is his bubble butt.
second, and way bigger: an idol group with some of your characters… but they all have tiddy windows.
"…your grace?"
you’re brought out of your stupor by ei, who is gazing in concern at you. you blink at her.
she struggles to find words. "are… are you sure everything is alright? is something not to your liking?"
it’s then that you realise you’ve started drooling at some point. shit.
you hurriedly wipe at it and clear your throat. "yeah, I’m sure. sorry, were you saying anything?"
she looks taken aback. "no, please don’t apologise. I should be the one to… I shouldn’t have interrupted your thinking."
it’s then that childe happens to walk by, and, like the attention hog he is, tries to get a foot into the conversation. you stay mostly unresponsive while the two chat (which seems to be mostly childe trying to hold a conversation with you while ei admonishes him), your eyes drifting back to ei’s tiddy window.
you really could stare at that for the rest of your life.
childe then follows your line of sight and chokes.
…though more because of him trying to laugh while choking on the dango he was eating than embarrassment at having caught onto your very appropriate thoughts.
ei looks confused but makes no move to help him other than pushing his head away from the table so he doesn’t make a mess. you honestly can’t bring yourself to be embarrassed.
he finally manages to swallow properly (you almost want to pat him on the back and praise him for swallowing like a good boy) before turning to you.
"do you want me to strip? my chest looks much nicer, I assure you."
you and ei stare at him.
he raises his eyebrows, pointing at her. "her skin looks way too soft and pampered." she looks almost offended. "mine’s covered in scars and I have actual muscles, doesn’t that feel much better for fondling?"
"what if…" you lean closer to him mischievously, like you’re about to tell him some big secret. "I prefer soft chests?"
he deflates. ei flushes, ducking her head into her still-near-full cup of bubble tea. "well, if that’s what you prefer… I can’t get rid of the scars, but I can stop working out. hmm…" he looks like he’s starting to make serious plans.
"no, I honestly don’t really care. all tiddy is good tiddy." you clap your hands. "anyway! it’s more about the boob window. you already have a (sad) tummy window, so it wouldn’t work."
"why not? wouldn’t that be double the sexy?"
"no, it cancels out."
you’re going to ignore whatever gorou has going on, because that works pretty well.
ei looks unfathomably lost.
"and anyway, if we’re talking about tummy windows, gorou wins."
he deflates further.
then he perks up.
"what about…" he brings his fingers to his face. you think it’s an attempt at looking cool. "butt window?"
you deadpan. "have fun getting arrested for public indecency."
he winks at you. "I wouldn’t mind getting arrested if you’re the one punishing me."
you have to physically hold the electro archon back.
"why, I wasn’t expecting to run into any of you here. what are you three up to?" kaeya’s voice cuts through ei’s snarls all of a sudden. he seems amused, but there’s an edge in the way he eyes childe.
"I am definitely sexier than any archon or soldier," childe says at the exact same time that you say "we’re discussing tiddy windows."
kaeya lets out something between a snort and a chuckle. it’s a pretty sound, but you can’t let yourself be distracted by him. he knows what he’s doing.
"oh? in that department, don’t I win?"
you stare intently at his.
"do you want to touch?"
you move your stare to his face. "am I allowed to?"
he smiles, mirth in his eye. "you needn’t ask. all of me belongs to you, and that includes my chest."
you seriously consider it and childe takes the opportunity to shove himself between the two of you.
"wait, wait! I offered first! ignore him, I’m right here!" "your grace," ei cuts in, "if you’d like to, I don’t mind you touching any part of me."
"ugh, fine, fine! I’ll just sample all of you then. if you’re sure you’re okay with it."
zhongli, somehow, picks the absolute worst moment to walk in.
the look on his face is priceless (you can’t tell if he looks offended or jealous), but even that doesn’t compare to the feeling of soft tiddy in your hands.
you were right, tiddy windows really are the best.
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ratatoast · 1 year ago
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Son coeur est le tien
Alastor x Reader qpr (general headcanons)
a/n: halfway through writing this, i realised that maybe my idea of a qpr might be different than someone else's haha,,, also, this is the very first time I've written for hazbin hotel lol (and should i mention that english isn't my first language? haha)
that being said, i hope y'all enjoy this mess :P
also also if y'all would like me to continue writing Alastor qpr (cuz there's def a shortage on that), feel free to send me prompts :)) i obvi wont write nsfw, but other than that, i think anything is fine (?)
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Being in a qpr with the radio demon would include…
Long talks over tea/coffee
There’s never any awkward silence between the two of you. You two could be chatting about the most mundane things, and the conversation would still flow perfectly.
He’d definitely learn exactly how you like your hot beverage.
I personally can’t imagine him being an avid coffee drinker tbh, but I don’t think he’d mind if you are one.
Takes your tea parties very seriously, knows all your favourite pastries, puts on some smooth jazz, brings out the fine china, etc
Loves listening to you talking about your day, your current interests, hobbies, etc. Even if the topic itself isn’t all that interesting to him, he’ll still listen to you.
The both of you love gossiping with each other. Neither of you will admit it to others though.
Petnames
You very rarely hear your given name come out of this man’s mouth.
He never calls you anything that he deems too sickly sweet, usually sticks to dear, sweetheart, or darling.
If he’s having a particularly great day, he might call you love, but that doesn’t happen very often.
Constant praises & words of affirmation
I think words of affirmation is one of his main love languages.
He constantly showers you with praises, telling you how gorgeous you look, how witty your jokes are, etc.
We all know that this man is a charmer, however his compliments to you are more than just empty words… most of the time :p
Do keep in mind that this man is a master manipulator tho, so he isn't above using sweet talk to get what he wants.
Playful banter that keeps you on your toes
He loves a good back and forth, especially if his darling is a particularly witty individual.
The two of you can turn any conversation into a battle of words.
However, if you take it too far, he’s not afraid to put you in your place with a couple of sharp words, aimed to hurt.
But most of the time it’s just good fun :)
Never having to so much as lift a finger
He’s very big on acts of service.
Forget about opening doors or pulling out chairs for yourself.
He takes being a gentleman very seriously, especially when it comes to you.
But not only is he a gentleman, he’s also a powerful overlord.
So if you ever need anything, be that a new pair of shoes, or getting rid of a particularly nasty demon, consider it done.
Being his closest confidant
We all know that Alastor has many acquaintances, however he falls short on meaningful connections.
He doesn’t let people get too close to him, and it is sort of understandable why.
You are one of the only exceptions to that.
You know more about this man than all of hell combined.
It took a while for him to open up to you, and even longer until he started telling you about his past.
He’s the kind to drop hints about himself and let you figure out the rest.
Trust goes a long way with him, I think he’d be more open to sharing his plans and such with someone that he knows won’t question his every move.
Even so, there’s still a lot that you don’t know about him, but you’ll just have to take what you can.
You can dress however you want… as long as it fits his taste
He’s not all too picky about what you wear.
Contrary to popular belief, he wouldn’t expect you to be in full glam 24/7.
If you like more revealing clothes, well, he’ll just have to make sure that anyone that dares to as much as look at you the wrong way is taken care of.
That being said, looking well put together is a must.
You represent him in a way, and he expects you to look the part.
He can’t have you wandering the streets of hell in rags that not even the lowest sinners would wear.
Absolutely no modern technology allowed
Do I even need to explain this?
He’d rather be safe than sorry when it comes to the possibility of Vox messing with you.
You are never truly alone
Alastor would make sure to accompany you on your outings as much as his schedule allows it.
But let’s be real, he’s a very busy man.
He makes sure that a few of his shadows keep an eye on you though, even in his absence.
I don’t think your personal strength matters in this case, as I’ve mentioned before, there’s very little that this man wouldn’t do for you, especially when it comes to your personal safety.
Lets you get closer to him than anyone else
This time, I’m talking about physical closeness.
We all know that he isn’t big on physical touch.
However, I feel like you could get away with a lot more than others.
When the two of you are walking somewhere, it’s not unusual for him to offer you his arm.
When you’re standing next to him, he sometimes rests his hand on your back, although that is often a subconscious thing.
If you’re having a particularly rough day, he isn’t too opposed to letting you hug him.
You can also get away with laying on his lap sometimes, and if he’s feeling exceptionally gracious, he might even pet your hair.
PDA is definitely a big no-no, on one hand he has an image to protect, but I also just don’t think he’d be too comfortable with showing his more vulnerable side in public.
As for kisses… if you haven’t seen each other in a while, he might greet you with a kiss on your hand, but that’s as far as it ever goes.
He’s not a very touchy-feely person, so if that bothers you… good luck finding someone better than the radio demon ;)
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me af tbh lmao
anway, thanks for reading pookies mwah (slash platonic lol)
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ironunderstands · 5 months ago
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AAAAAAAAA
Genuinely I feel annoying as fuck for saying this but like I can’t stand the way anybody else but me or my mutuals writes Aventio/Ratiorine 90% of the time
So, to vent my frustration, here’s a not in order at all bulleted list of stuff I absolutely despise when seeing content of them. This is not to call ppl out or anything, I just wanna rant about my preferences lol
oh and cw: mentions of slavery, nsfw, suicidal tendencies and non-con
-one or both of them being way to horny/flirty
Maybe this could work in content with an established relationship, but like, these guys don’t fuck, I’m sorry, they don’t. They are the biggest virgin losers ever regardless of if they have had sex in the past or not. Some of yall don’t get that they were acting in Penacony for the most part and Aventurine’s flirtiness didn’t have any weight behind it, he was really just messing with Ratio. I think if he were seriously trying to court Ratio, he’d probably be LESS flirty, but that’s just me. I understand why people make nsfw of them without any kinda buildup because well it’s fun, but for me personally I don’t really like it 90% of the time, however I fully get this is a me thing. I can tolerate it more in fanart bc well it’s fanart so yeah there’s not gonna be 3000k words of lore behind it, but like if I’m reading a fic and Aventio go from not even being in a relationship to having sex on a whim it just confuses me.
-yandere anything
I despise this trope already but it makes me 100000x more annoyed because holy shit neither of them would be a yandere I get it some people like this but WHYY THEMMM it doesn’t make sense. Yandere Aventurine makes me even more mad bc why the fuck would he make someone suffer like he did when he was younger???
-emotionless Ratio
Idk why half the community treats Ratio like he’s an unfeeling logic robot who’s sole goal is knowledge even when the game beats you over the head about how he’s the exact fucking opposite of that, but honestly I think this is just a symptom of the fact that a lot of ratiorine writers don’t give two fucks about him at all and he’s practically written as a plot device for Aventurine’s characterization.
-misunderstanding why Ratio is a tsundere
I’ve seen a lot of people misinterpret how and why Ratio is a tsundere towards Aventurine, citing it as if he doesn’t want to be associated with him/looks down upon him/is ashamed to like him when that’s really not true at all. Ratio respects and cares about Aventurine a hell of a lot, and he isn’t shy at all to show it when it’s necessary (see DSAIWYTBOL or the “if you can’t hold on any longer then tell me”). However, the reason he pushes away Aventurine isn’t exactly personal (although Aventurine’s closeness to him is part of the reason why).
Rather, Ratio tends to downplay his close relationships a lot, likely as a defense mechanism, as he admits himself that he isn’t good with people in one of the dialogue options with trailblazer for the express visits. Now why he is this way is a subject of speculation because Ratio rarely ever talks about himself, and the only character who actually has a voiceline on him is Aventurine himself, so it’s very hard to get an outside perspective on him. His character stories don’t really help that much either, as they are more about his personal philosophy and journey in life rather than his personality.
However, taking what Ratio says towards Aventurine at face value when he has proven the opposite (especially considering how the trope of the tsundere is kinda centered on the character in question spouting bullshit) results in people completely misunderstanding their relationship which can get REALLY annoying. Ratio doesn’t think Aventurine is an idiot in the slightest, he just worries about how his methods put himself in danger, not his capabilities.
-fast burn
You’re telling me these emotionally constipated idiots will get together easily? No. There’s a reason I write the most crazy bullshit happening to them before a confession scene and that’s because that’s the only way you can get them to confront their goddamn feelings quickly.
-slavery aus/anything like this
Self explanatory. If you have fetishized Aventurine’s past or made stuff like this please stay 1000 feet away from me at all times or block me. Thank you 🙏
-babying Aventurine
He’s one of the most competent members of the cast, but somehow people act like his breakdown scene in 2.1 is how he behaves 24/7 when that isn’t true at all. Aventurine is incredibly smart, and single-handedly clawed his way to the top. He does not need Ratio to save him. Would he appreciate Ratio’s support? Of course, and he definitely needs loving relationships in his life, but Aventurine isn’t a damsel in distress and not everything in his life is miserable and related to his trauma.
-or the horrible reverse of babying Aventurine: his trauma doesn’t exist actually and he’s perfectly fine/ they write him like it never happened
This one is rather rare and it has overlap with a few of the other points (seriously I’m gonna tweak out the next time someone writes the character who is implied to have survived sex trafficking being a person who would even dream of crossing others boundaries). Usually this happens because people treat Aventurine’s playboy mask as if it’s his actual personality and not traits he picked up to survive and succeed at his goals, and while admittedly even Aventurine is losing track of where the mask ends and he begins, some of y’all take it wayy to far even going on to unironically call him a fuckboy when he’s anything but that. The thing is, I think this happens when people erase who Kakavasha is from their minds, and act as if that side of Aventurine is a purely innocent child and all the “bad” parts of him are part of Aventurine’s mask. However, that’s not true, and Aventurine’s most admirable traits ARE Kakavasha’s. His strategicness, his intellegence, his bravery, these are all traits he possessed long before becoming Aventurine of stratagems, something which he demonstrated when he for example got his sisters neckless back, or made that bet with his first enslaver.
Aventurine’s purity and Aventurine’s capabilities are not separated between Kakavasha and Aventurine of Stratagems, both of those qualities ARE Kakavasha’s so if you are going to write him with the mask off, you have to write BOTH, not give into one or the other.
The things I tend to drop when writing him with the mask off are his false compliments and niceties, acting like he really gives a shit about the IPC’s goals, turning down the flamboyance and cockiness to reasonable levels and making him seem less like he’s playing pretend. Honestly I don’t think it’s that hard yet this is still a pitfall I see a lot of people stumbling into.
-Ratio talking like a goddamn encyclopedia
I understand he’s like that sometimes, but he also is well versed in internet lingo and seriously nobody unironically talks like that 24/7 because it’s pointless, and Ratio doesn’t use big words to seem smart, he uses them when they are necessary.
Like I’m sorry but if they are in a middle of having sex and unprompted Ratio starts talking like a biology textbook I’m closing the fic and running around my room screaming BECAUSE GOD IS IT CRINGE. Promoted it can be funny because yeah I can see him doing that but oh my god HE WOULD NOT SAY THAT I don’t even want to give an example it pisses me off that bad but trust me it’s a common phenomenon AND I HATE IT
-Aventurine trying to kill himself 24/7
He isn’t an active suicide risk every goddamn day of his life, he’s just self destructive and those are TWO DIFFERENT THINGS.
Yes, he tested if you could die in the dreamscape several times, but that’s because one of the favorable outcomes for his mission WOULD BE DYING in the dreamscape. He’s not doing this during a normal work week and even if I believe he still has suicidal tendencies, he’s not gonna throw his life away randomly or over nothing
-Ratio holds authority over Aventurine in any capacity
No, just no. Like the only other thing he might have over him is being intelligent, although they both are smart at different things so even then does it matter? Like I’m sorry but normal human with the ability to float and make imaginary constructs versus LITERAL FUCKING STONEHEART is not a fair fight on Ratio’s end. It doesn’t matter that he’s physically larger than Aventurine, muscles don’t mean shit in a sci-fi setting, especially when your opponent can just summon 3 bajillion coins to drop into your head at a whim and there’s nothing you can do about it. Not like Aventurine would ever dream of hurting him, of course, but seriously people need to stop acting like their different in stature really means anything. Even in terms of position, Aventurine probably outranks him so this false sense of authority people apply to Ratio in their relationship is confusing at best.
Hmm, well that’s all the things I remember to bitch about although I probably have more complaints. To be fair, whenever they aren’t written like incredibly smart people who are idiots hopelessly in love with one another when together I pop a blood vessel so most of these (besides THAT one) are non issues and if you have made/enjoyed these don’t feel ashamed because of my opinions. I needed to let out my inner grinch every once and awhile, so thanks for reading
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notsoattractivearenti · 2 years ago
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1+1 = 4 (Mason Mount x Fem!Reader)
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WC: 3.0K
Warnings: mention of c-section, post-surgery recovery
A/N: i haven’t written anything since last month and i’ve missed writing so here it is... dad!Mason for me and y'all my loves 🥰🫶🏻 apologies if this isn’t so good lol tbh i wrote this for my own comfort cuz it's been an extremely rough few weeks so i kinda needed this and i’m a huge sucker for my faves as attentive partner and dad fics! not to mention this is officially the longest fic I've written + posted here! hope you guys enjoy and i’d love to hear your thoughts thru ask/reply/reblog 💗 apologies for any grammatical errors! feedbacks are highly appreciated 🤍
You just woke up from a short nap after your C-section. Your baby was not supposed to be born for another month, but when your doctor saw the umbilical cord was wrapped around their neck during ultrasound, they told you and Mason that an emergency C-section had to be done the next day before your baby moved to the birth position. You recalled the day it happened.
You were really scared and nervous even though you have given birth before – but your first pregnancy and labor went smoothly so you didn’t exactly anticipate this. Plus, you had never gone through any major surgery your whole life ­– you just were not ready at all. You wanted another vaginal delivery but since the circumstances changed, you didn’t have a choice and all you cared about was your little one coming into the world safe and sound.
Mason was scared too, but he tried to conceal it from you. He just knew he had to be by your side all the time, as you were about to go through another life-changing moment but not as you planned. He was worried about the baby but even more about you ­– he felt so helpless because he basically couldn’t do anything but be there for you. If he could, he would make himself be the one who bears the pain instead of you.
On the way home after the checkup, you sat in the passenger seat and just silently stared at the road with your hand resting on top of your belly – subconsciously rubbing it sometimes – while thinking about the sudden news. Mason noticed how quiet you were, and as he drove he grabbed your hand to hold it tight.
“My dear, everything will be okay,” he said softly, “little peanut will be just fine. So will you.”
You sighed. “Maybe you’re right, but Mase...” Your voice was shaky, “I’m terrified. I really am...”
He took his eyes off the road for a second to glance at you, then kissed your hand and rubbed it with his thumbs repeatedly.
“I know, Y/N. But you’re the strongest person I’ve ever known and you’re going to get through this like the badass you are.” He assured you.
“And I will be with you the entire time and take care of you. I promise.” He added.
You smiled a little, still nervous but way less than before. You knew he was also worried yet he still gave you the comfort you needed. That is one of the things about Mason that made you fall in love with him in the first place.
“Also, picture how excited Gem will be when she finds out she’s going to meet her baby sibling soon!”
Before Mason even finished his sentence, the possible scenario was already playing in your head. You looked back to the time you and Mason broke the news to Gemma, your 4 year-old daughter – she screamed then cried out of happiness. She has been so excited to have a little sister or brother since and kept asking when will the baby be born. You could clearly imagine how she would react this time.
“Oh God,” you put your hand on your forehead and jokingly groaned, “she’s going to scream her ass off again isn’t she?”
He shook his head playfully and laughed. “Well that’s my daughter alright!”
During the surgery, Mason was sitting next to you the whole time, not wanting to let go of your hand. You were fully conscious since you had regional anesthesia, and to distract yourself from your anxious thoughts you and Mason chatted about the most random things – and it helped calming you down.
You both decided not to find out about your baby’s sex just like when you were pregnant with Gemma. Of course you two were curious, but you wanted to surprise yourselves. A boy or a girl, it doesn't really matter because you will love the baby regardless of the sex.
Suddenly, you both heard the sound of your baby’s cry. The doctor lifted them up so you two could see and excitedly announced, “Congratulations, it’s a girl!”
You and Mason had your mouths wide open and looked at each other immediately once you knew you had another daughter. She came to join your little family sooner than expected, but she was healthy and all your worry was gone in an instant. Mason kissed your forehead and your lips, then whispered to your ears, “Thank you baby, I’m so proud of you.”
The nurse then brought the baby to you so you could see her up close. She put her next to your face, and you could feel tears of happiness streaming down your face – the presence of your newborn girl warmed your heart.
“Hi baby girl,” you tearfully greeted your daughter, “welcome to the world! Mommy loves you so much.”
Mason watched that moment and he was left speechless. He couldn’t stop smiling and crying as he couldn’t find the words to describe the overwhelming joy and immense love he felt at the moment. He was still processing the fact that he had another girl to love for the rest of his life. As he wiped his tears, he quietly whimpered in awe, “she’s so precious… My little peanut.”
As you woke up from your nap post surgery, you could feel the anesthesia started to wear off. You moaned and pressed your lips together over the pain you felt on the incision area. You couldn’t really get up because when you tried to move even a little bit, it would hurt so bad. You looked around the hospital room you were in and you saw Mason sitting on the sofa near the window while holding your newborn daughter.
He didn’t take his eyes off of her even for a second, you could tell he was so in love. This reminded you of the day when Gemma was just born – once he held her in his arms, his eyes were locked on her.
You couldn’t stop staring at him as you found this moment so heartwarming and adorable. He then took a quick look at you and when he saw you were awake, a wide smile appeared on his face.
“Oh look, Mommy’s awake,” he said as he got off the sofa to come over to you, “how are you feeling sweetheart?”
“Uh… pain...” You muttered. “But don’t worry, I’m okay.”
“Oh no… I’m sorry, Y/N.” He knitted his eyebrows, the tone of his voice showed how worried he really was. “Tell me what I can do to help ease it. I’ll do anything to make you feel better.”
You smiled as his hand was stroking your arm.
“Thank you love,” you said to Mason, “but let’s just wait for the nurse. With you two here with me right now I can handle this pain.”
“By the way… Can you stop hogging my baby and hand her over to her mom?” You jokingly asked him.
“Oops, sorry!” He laughed while gently putting her on your side.
Few hours later, the nurse suggested you get out of bed and try walking around for a bit. Even though you were still experiencing discomfort, you gladly took her suggestion as you didn’t like laying in the bed for too long. Mason, who wasn’t fond of the idea, expressed his concern to the nurse.
“Ma’am, are you sure it’s okay? The wound on my wife’s stomach is still fresh… Isn’t it too soon?”
“Sir, I get your concern and I can guarantee you it is necessary as it is a part of the recovery. Moving around after the surgery helps the recovery process. Don’t need to worry, we’ll check in on you every so often. If you need anything, you can call us by pushing the button next to the bed.” The nurse explained to both of you in a calm manner.
Mason sighed in relief and nodded.
“Thank you,” you said to the nurse, “this is my first time going through a C-section and my husband and I have been very anxious about it. Not to mention this was unplanned so we didn’t exactly come prepared.”
“Understandable. It is normal to feel nervous, Ma’am. We are happy to help.” The nurse acknowledged your worries.
As soon as the nurse left the room, you tried to get out of bed and grimaced while one of your hands was on your wound area. Mason was getting you a glass of water when he saw you – fright was written all over his face immediately.
“Baby!” He spontaneously yelled as he rushed over to your side and helped you. out.
“Ssshh, Mase, I’m alright,” you put your arm around his neck and tried to soothe him, “just want to get up, that's all.”
“Don’t be so stubborn!” He was shaking a little – he felt a genuine fear. “My God, Y/N, you almost gave me a heart attack.”
“Oh please, don’t be a drama queen,” you couldn’t help but make fun of his reaction. “I said I’m alright, hahaha!”
He playfully rolled his eyes in response. You laughed at him and suddenly felt stabbing pain on your wound.
“Ouch!” You shouted. “Man, I can't even laugh without feeling pain!”
“Well, I’m glad you were amused but I guess no more comedy for a while for you, Mrs. Mount.” he said as he stroked your back.
Mason gently supported your body and carefully assisted you on taking your first steps post surgery. You squeezed your eyes, ground your teeth and winced as you were still experiencing the sharp pain – especially when you moved. Mason’s heart ached seeing you struggling like this, he felt guilty even but he knew nothing else he could do but support you throughout the recovery.
“Don’t rush it, sweetheart. It hasn’t been 12 hours after the surgery,” he emphasized. “Just take one little step at the time when you’re ready, okay?”
“Baby, Gem is coming here with my parents!” He excitedly shouted from across the room.
Your eyes widened and a squeal left your mouth when you heard that Gemma was coming. As you were in the hospital, Mason’s parents were taking care of her. You have been looking forward to the moment when your girls finally met. She had been impatiently waiting to be able to hold her baby sibling – she even practiced with her doll all the time. 
At this point you could stand up, walk, and sit down. The incision still hurt and discomfort came and went all the time but the painkiller was working well and the bliss of having a newborn was able to distract your mind from the pain. Mason had been so attentive to you and always ready to help you. He thought you needed a day to rest, therefore with your permission he respectfully asked everyone – except your parents and siblings – not to pay a visit at the hospital and wait until you all settled at your home instead. 
“Where is Gem now? Is she close? Are they here already?” You eagerly asked.
“I don’t know,” he answered, “I’ll call my mum.”
And before he even pressed call, Debbie texted him to let him know they just arrived at the hospital. He was beaming when he saw the text, and passed the news to you.
“They’re here! I’ll go get them,” he said as he kissed your forehead and got out to pick them up.
Trying not to hurt yourself, you didn’t act too excited on the outside but you sure were within. Sitting down on your bed, you pulled the baby crib closer and carefully picked her up.
“Hey little angel,” you whispered softly into her tiny ear, “you’re about to meet your big sister. She’s been waiting for you… You’re going to love her as much as she loves you.”
She made a slight smile and you noticed that. You chuckled, you thought it was like she was also excited to meet Gemma. You gave little kisses all over her cute face, and as you did that you could feel how you were completely filled with great love and glee – one more girl has stolen your heart. 
Suddenly, you heard the door was opened, followed by a little giggle you love so much. Your heart was beating really fast – it was going to be one of the biggest moments in your life – you didn’t know if you could handle your emotions when it happened.
You saw Gemma walking in with one hand holding her dad’s and the other covering her mouth. She looked so eager to finally see her baby sibling – she didn’t know it was a girl beforehand – and you wanted to see how she reacted when she found out she had a sister. Behind them were Debbie and Tony, and Debbie had already started recording with Mason’s phone. Gemma then saw you and excitedly yelled, “Mommy!”
You giggled and waved at her in response. 
“Do you want to sit next to Mommy and baby peanut, Gem?” Mason gently asked her.
“Yes Daddy! I want to see my baby peanut now!” She responded impatiently.
Mason picked her up and sat her down next to you. When she saw her sister up close, she squealed and said “Wow, baby peanut is so small and cute!”
You introduced your firstborn to your newborn.
“Gemma, meet Iris…”
She gasped and looked at both you and Mason in disbelief.
“You have a sister, Gem!” Mason cheered.
Gemma was so happy to have a sister and she started to cry. You might have pictured this beautiful moment in your head before but what really happened was a lot better than you had imagined. It was quite overwhelming to see how emotional she was and you eventually cried as well. Mason was really touched, almost shed a tear when he saw how you and Gemma were crying. He immediately grabbed some tissues from his pocket – he was aware this was going to happen – to wipe the tears off his girls’ faces.
“Mommy… Can I hold Iris?” Gemma nervously asked, her big brown eyes were still watery but you could see the sparkles of joy in them.
“Of course, sweetie.”
You carefully handed Iris onto Gemma’s lap, teaching her how to support Iris’ little body. She was so gentle and cautious, uneasy at first as if she was afraid to hurt Iris. Mason tried to ease her since he got how nervous Gemma was – he kissed the top of her head over and over again while assuring her that she was doing fine holding her sister – and it worked out even though it took a while.
Finally feeling comfortable, Gemma gently let go of one of her hands and started caressing Iris’ cheeks. Her eyes were locked in just like his dad earlier, and you just knew she was so deeply in love with her little sister. 
“She’s so beautiful, isn’t she, Gem?” Mason was beaming in awe and Gemma nodded in agreement.
Both Gemma and Mason showered Iris with kisses. The immense amount of love Iris was getting made your heart soar. You looked at your husband and your girls and thought to yourself: how did I get so lucky?
Mason then gave you a quick but passionate kiss on your lips. He looked deeply into your eyes and expressed his gratitude and appreciation for you.
“Y/N, the way you had to bear the pain to bring me two amazing kids to our life is unbelievable. You are the most incredible woman and I can never thank you enough for everything you’ve done for me, for us… I’m so lucky to have you as my wife and the mother of our girls. I will always try to make you happy, feel loved and give you everything you need and deserve because you have given me the life I’ve always dreamed of…”
You had no words and were about to cry again. You pulled him closer and pressed your lips against his – it was a moment full of tenderness and sweet affection. As your lips parted, you two whispered “I love you” to one another.
Debbie – who was still recording – and Tony were also emotional although they were trying to keep themselves together because they thought they didn’t want to ruin the beautiful moment between your little family. You then asked the grandparents to come see the newest addition to the Mount family.
“Iris Mount… Such a beautiful name, Y/N!” Tony complimented.
“That’s perfect for her! Thank you, Y/N, for giving us wonderful grandkids!” Debbie chimed in and gave you a hug.
“Uh, Mum… I contributed too, you know. Why don’t I get a thank-you? ” Mason jokingly protested.
“Yes but you weren’t the one who carried them for months and gave birth, were you?” Debbie lightheartedly replied.
You chuckled at their banter – you held yourself back from laughing as usual because it would hurt you.
With his mother clearly winning the argument, Mason humorously backed out, pouted then stated his closing statement.
“That’s true. But Y/N and I do make the most beautiful babies.”
Debbie and Tony couldn’t help but laugh at his comeback.
Yes, he might not be the one who was pregnant and given birth, but he has always been an amazing and present father to Gemma. No matter how tight his schedule could be, he would always make time for her daughter. He might have missed a few milestones that happened unexpectedly but other than those he never wanted to miss out so much on his daughter’s life. When he was out of town for away games, he always asked for daily updates on Gemma and called you on Facetime in every chance he got.
Mason is an ultimate girl dad and takes great pride in it. He would dress up as princess wearing a tiara and Gemma’s little dress that barely fits him and have a tea party with her, buy a makeup set she asked for, and sometimes he would show up at training wearing a headband with the biggest bow on his head because Gemma put it on him before he left. He always said he loves being a girl dad and would do it all over again – now he really gets to do it all over again…
taglist: @pulisicsgirl @neverinadream @masonspulisic @swimmingismywholelife @chelseagirl98 @bracedes @lovelynikol16 @thoseboysinblue @lizzypotter14 @mortirolo @masonsrem
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vodika-vibes · 9 months ago
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Hello lovely! Could I please request Ruby for Dogma x female reader where they both have huge crushes on each other, but are too shy to say anything; one day after Dogma comes back from a long tour and she just decides to go for it and she glomps him, kissing him on the lips over and over again while his brother's are just standing there, jealously gawking lol. I hope this inspires you and I hope that what you're coming down with doesn't last long!🌼
Take A Chance
Summary: You’ve been crushing on Dogma for, what feels like, years. But you’ve always been too nervous to actually put your feelings into words. But, after your closest friend tells you that she’s going to invite Dogma into her bed when he returns from his deployment, you decide to take a chance.
Pairing: Clone Trooper Dogma x Reader
Word Count: 852
Warnings: Some angst at the beginning, but there's a happy ending. Also, reader has a toxic friend
Tagging: @trixie2023 @n0vqni @imabeautifulbutterfly
A/N: So, I didn't follow your prompt to the letter, but I think I'm happy with this, so I hope you are too!
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Anxiety twists your stomach as you lean against the flowering tree on the base that the 501st call home when they’re not deployed. 
The Resolute docked about an hour ago. It’s only a matter of time before they actually come back to the base, and that’s the thing that is making you so anxious.
Not that they’re coming back, no. 
But the fact that you’re going to see Dogma.
Kind Dogma. Handsome Dogma.
Dogma, who you’ve been crushing on for months. Who you’ve been too shy to confess to, because he might not feel the same.
Dogma, who your best friend decided that she was going to try and bed, even though she knows about your crush on him. Her argument was that since you haven’t said anything yet, then he’s free game.
You warned her that if she did this, she would lose your friendship forever. And she just didn’t care.
So that definitely isn’t helping your anxiety. It’s not like you have so many friends that you can afford to lose any of them…even bad friends are better than no friends, right?
You lift your head when you hear the familiar sound of heavy boots on the paved road, and a small smile crosses your lips when you see the 501st trekking back to their barracks.
Knowing them, most of them are going to change and hit up the bars or go and find their partners.
They deserve it.
And then there’s Dogma, talking to Tup, joking about something based on the wry grin on Tup’s face, and your heart lurches. You love him. You want to be his and him to be yours and…
And…
And you can’t do it.
Your hands curl into fists and you drop your gaze away from the man that you love so much.
He deserves…more. So much more.
You jump when a pair of boots stop in front of you, “Credit for your thoughts?”
“They’re hardly worth that much.” You reply automatically, before you lift your gaze. Dogma is standing in front of you, concern written clearly on his face, “Ah…welcome back, Dogma.”
“Thanks.” His dark eyes scan your face, “What’s wrong, you look upset.” His brow furrowed, “Did someone threaten you?”
“No. Nothing like that. Just…coming to a realization about myself, is all.”
“Wanna share?”
“It’s not important.”
“It’s important enough that it upset you.”
You hesitate, “Well…” You fold your arms, “There’s a guy-” Dogma’s expression twitches slightly, but he just motions for you to continue, “And I just realized that I’m never going to be good enough for him.”
“If he thinks that then he’s a karking idiot.” Dogma replies, “You’re amazing.”
“No, he didn’t…” You hesitate, “That was me coming to that realization, not…” You sigh, “Like I said, not important.”
Dogma is quiet for a moment, “Well,” He finally says, “Since you have this…guy,” His tone is odd, but he continues before you can question it, “I guess you’re not interested in getting a drink or something with me?”
“...what?”
“Like, caf. Or maybe something else, since you don’t drink caf.” Dogma adds, and then he flashes a wry smile, “Sorry, I had a plan, but now that I’m standing here, I can’t quite remember it.”
“A plan?”
“For asking you out. On a date.” He rubs the back of his neck, “But, you just said there’s a guy, so I guess you’re not interested-”
You stare at him, blankly for a moment. And then you step into his space and press your lips against his in an awkward kiss. You pull away quickly, and Dogma stares at you, as though his brain needs a moment to reboot.
He stares at you for long enough that you shift nervously, and avert your gaze, “U-um…I shouldn’t have-”
You’re not able to finish your sentence before Dogma’s lips are hot against yours, and he has you pressed against the tree behind you. Unlike your kiss, which was hesitant and very chaste, his kiss is sure and quickly becomes passionate.
And you’re helpless but to match his intensity, your arms coming up to wrap around his neck and he pins you against the tree.
There’s a loud whistle and a shout of, “Get it, Dogma!” Which causes him to break the kiss, but he doesn’t pull away, instead he presses his forehead against yours, and he raises his hand to flip off whichever brother that was.
There’s the sound of laughter, and then the audience disperses, not that you notice that, as your focus is locked on Dogma, who has all of his attention focused on you.
“So,” Dogma says as he leans in slightly, his lips hovering just over yours, “I’m the guy?”
“You’re the guy.” You agree.
Dogma exhales slowly, his breath fanning across your face, “Good.” He breathes out.
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.” His gaze drops to your lips, “So…that date?”
“I’d like to go get some caf with you, Dogma.”
“Then I’ll go change and we can do that.” He murmurs, “But…first…” He trails off as his lips catch yours one more time. 
And, eagerly, you kiss him back.
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cal-daisies-and-briars · 2 months ago
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Okay Cal I’ve taken some time and calmed down and now I’m so very normal about this news. Nico’s back well isn’t that nice. I feel so very casual about that. Just :) so :) normal :)
First theme this round is non-human Buddie!
🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲 (IM OBSESSED WITH THIS ONE!!!! Really loving Buck’s hearing loss story and can’t wait to see where you take it! And I’ve got Thoughts™️ about how it might play into the Diaz family magic… It seems like you’re doing the publish once it’s all written thing again - how many chapters are you planning on having?)
🧜‍♂️🧜‍♂️🧜‍♂️🧜‍♂️🧜‍♂️🧜‍♂️🧜‍♂️🧜‍♂️🧜‍♂️🧜‍♂️🧜‍♂️🧜‍♂️🧜‍♂️🧜‍♂️🧜‍♂️🧜‍♂️🧜‍♂️🧜‍♂️🧜‍♂️🧜‍♂️🧜‍♂️🧜‍♂️(IM INTRIGUED!! And lol this emoji has bracelets on the arm that totally reminded me of Buck’s line arm tattoo so it’s meant to be! There’s so many interesting directions I feel like this one could go and I’m very excited to watch it play out!)
-PCA <3
HI PCA! So happy you're so excited for Nico.
In the meantime, the creature fics!
96 for 🌲 (THANK YOU!!!!! That makes me so happy. I'm really pumped for this one. I want to hear your thoughts! Yes, publishing this once it's all done. I have a ten chapter outline!)
---
It’s not for very long. Buck said the appointment shouldn’t take more than an hour, plus driving. No biggie. Eddie can handle that. He’s an adult. 
He tells himself the fear is that when he’s alone, something will happen. He’ll cover his house in more leaves and turn more and more into an animal until he loses his human mind. His back will become completely hollow like in all his nightmares. He thinks his fears are rooted in pragmatism. But when Buck is actually gone, the truth of it becomes clear. 
It’s painful. 
Buck being gone is actually physically painful for Eddie. He doesn’t know why. He gets this ache all over his body. This gripping sense of panic and nausea combined. He can hardly function. He needs Buck to be back. He needs to not be alone. His brain sort of abandons reason and starts spiraling to some dark place where he’s forever shut out from any sort of human interaction forever. Where he is utterly isolated. 
He doesn’t just think of Buck. He thinks of Christopher, hating him. His team at work, thinking he abandoned them. Adriana, missing without a trace. Shannon, dead. He starts to shake. It feels like some sort of withdrawal; or at least what he imagines that would feel like. He needs some sort of company. Anyone. Anything. Most of all, he needs Buck to come home. 
There’s a knock on the door around the time Eddie is expecting Buck to get back. If Eddie was in his right mind, he would know it’s not Buck. He would know the door is unlocked, and Buck can walk in. He would know that Buck has keys, regardless. 
Throwing aside any sort of precaution or rational thought, Eddie hurries to open the door. He doesn’t have much in the way of a disguise to conceal himself. He’s still wearing Buck’s sweatpants. Nothing for his face. He doesn’t even think about it. What he must look like to someone who isn’t expecting to see it. 
He’s surprised to see that it’s Tommy at the door. Arms crossed, angry impatient look on his face. Tommy, Buck’s boyfriend. He’s probably here for Buck. But he’s Eddie’s friend, too. Maybe he can keep Eddie company until Buck gets back. 
Not single thought of his own protection in his head, Eddie throws open the door. 
“Hey, Tommy,” he says. “What’s up, man?”
Tommy looks furious and confused. He looks Eddie over, eyes scrunching with confusion. 
“Where’s Evan?” He demands. He blinks a few times. Rubs one of his ears. “I know he’s with you and… And I…”
“Buck isn’t here right now. Should be soon. Do you want to come inside?”
“Do I…” Tommy’s eyes sort of glaze over. It’s like watching drugs settle in. The anger all but evaporates from his face. “Yeah, Eddie. Of course I want to come in.”
Eddie is pleased. That’s good. He didn’t want to be alone anymore. He can already feel the pain in his body beginning to subside. 
“Come on, man. I’ll get you a beer,” Eddie says. No matter that it’s eleven in the morning. 
“I’d love that,” Tommy says. 
He leads Tommy inside towards the kitchen. He grabs two beers from the fridge. He doesn’t think about the tail creating a strange bulge in the back of his pants. He doesn’t think of the fact that he’s wearing Tommy’s boyfriend’s pants. He doesn’t think of anything and Tommy’s not reacting to anything. It all must be fine. 
When he turns around to hand Tommy the beer, Tommy takes a step towards him, leaving very little room between him and the fridge. Eddie feels a bit cornered. 
“Uh, hi?” Eddie asks. He tries to give Tommy the beer but Tommy doesn’t take it. Won’t even look at it. 
“Eddie, I think we should talk,” Tommy says.
Eddie gets a bad feeling. 
“Okay… Uh, sure. About what?”
“Us,” Tommy says. 
Eddie coughs a little. “Us?”
“You and me,” Tommy says. 
“What you and me?” Eddie asks.
Tommy smirks a little. “What we could be to each other.”
Eddie blinks. “Uh… Friends? Friends with someone very important  in common?”
Eddie might be feeling a little out of it lately, but he’s not insane. 
“Oh, come on, Eddie,” Tommy says. “You had to know there was something between us. If you hadn’t been seeing that woman. What was her name?”
“Marisol?” He asks. Or Kim? Both? Jesus, he’s a mess.
---
66 for 🧜‍♂️ (YAY! Thank you! I am excited to reveal my - and Annie's - plans):
---
He knows that it changes you. In lots of strange ways, some small and some large. 
“I’d had an accident not too long before that,” Chimney says. “Nearly died, myself. But… I don’t know. It’s different for Buck. Especially about Bobby. I think he’s just jealous you’re the new, shiny person on the team.”
Eddie is hardly new and shiny. Buck just doesn’t know that.
Eddie nods. “I’ll… Well, I’ll try I guess. To get on his good side or whatever.”
“I don’t think he has a bad side,” Hen says. “Just be patient. He’ll come around.” 
Eddie holds onto this promise. Hopes that it’s true. And really, really hopes his suspicions aren’t correct. 
🌻
Things get worse. 
There’s some downtime in the shift. Eddie decides to hit the station gym. Unfortunately, Buck is already there with Chimney. He considers turning around and walking away, not wanting to deal with the guy more than he needs to. But he doesn’t want to give him the satisfaction. He doesn’t want to be scared off in his own workplace. Not again. 
So Eddie starts on the other side of the equipment from Buck. The punching bag. He gets a conversation started up with Chimney. They talk about the firefighter calendar, which Chimney wants a spot in. Something Buck doesn’t seem thrilled about. It’s clear Buck wants to win, from all the absurd selfies he’s been snapping. 
“Are you gonna submit photos, Eddie?” Chim asks. “Be honest, you’ve probably got washboard abs under that shirt. You submit one of those classic shirtless suspenders photos and you’re a shoe in.”
Ha. No. Abs? Sure. A shirtless photo? No way. 
Across the gym, Buck makes a frustrated noise. Mutters something under his breath. Eddie doesn’t hear it, but he gets the tone. And all he can hear is the sound of someone suggesting he isn’t man enough for the competition. Whether or not it’s what Buck says, it’s what Eddie takes in. 
So he sort of snaps. 
“What’s your problem, man?” He demands, marching over to Buck at the weights. 
Buck looks up at him. He seems surprised to have been confronted. Surprised, but not unwilling to rise to the bait. He stands up, gets close to Eddie, peacocking his considerable height. He’s not that much taller than Eddie, but it sure feels like it, in this moment. 
“Okay. You.” Buck says, voice low and tight. “You’re my problem. Your comfort level.”
Eddie’s comfort level? Is he serious? He’s been doing everything he can to make Eddie uncomfortable. Is Eddie, what? Supposed to know his place? Stay silent and in the background because he’s different? How does Buck even know that he’s different? 
“You’re-you’re not supposed to walk in here like you’ve been here for years,” Buck keeps going. “It’s meant to be a getting-to-know-you period. You’re meant to respect your elders.”
“You’re not his elder, Buck,” Chimney interjects. 
“I don’t know how old you are,” Eddie replies. “But I’m not a probie. I’ve been a firefighter-paramedic for six years. But if you have some sort of prejudice that makes you think I’m not fit for the job-”
“Wait, what?” Buck interrupts. “Prejudice?”
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clockwork-ashes · 10 days ago
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thank you @olenvasynyt for the tag! this was so fun :)
2024 Fic Writer End of Year Roundup
Answer and then tag three or more creators to keep the game going!
1. How many words did you publish on AO3 in 2024? 
160,904
2. How many fics did you complete this year?
if i count one-shots??? 15 fics. without them??? only 4!
3. How many in progress or ongoing fics did you start this year?
oh goodness, i really haven’t completed any of my multi-chapter fics this year LOL i have 5 ongoing ones (that i hope will be finished in 2025).
4. What was your favorite thing you wrote?
my favourite thing that i wrote this year i think has to be my erisweek2024 series of one-shots!!! i put a lot of time and thought into light the fire bright and i was SO happy with the final outcome!
outsider was also one of my favourite one-shots that i wrote! it was the first one i put up on ao3 and i was just super proud of myself for putting it up there :)
5. What piece was your most experimental or different from your usual style?
definitely something lonesome just because of the time loop aspect!!! it’s a lot of fun, and i like it being just a little darker than everything else i’ve written!!!
6. Did any fics surprise you - either while writing or their reception?
this has got to be all you have is your fire. it’s my first attempt at writing a romance-centred fic that follows a plot, and without everyone who read it and let me know they liked it, i would have given up writing it entirely!!! i was surprised that people were reading it, and the initial reception is a huge motivation for me to continue with it <3 thank you lovely readers!!!
7. Do you have a fic you wrote and loved that went under the radar? (This is your sign to reblog/repost it!)
maybe prince of ashes??? that fic is old and i posted it onto ao3 really quickly just to have it up there LOL so it makes sense that it went under the radar!!!
8. Who is an artist that inspired you
so many!!! especially @works-of-heart, @velidewrites, and @elleybug!!! there’s MORE but if i’ve reblogged your work, you have 100% inspired me <3
9. Who is an author that inspired you?
i just have so many (and i’m sorry to those i forget)! definitely @zenkindoflove really inspires me with her amazing works (with elucien and also with eris x alexius). the relationships just feel SO real in your stories <3 @the-darkestminds also is just so talented, the angst in autumn’s shadow is unmatched!!! @olenvasynyt has the most amazing fic for anyone looking to read about lucien (i cannot get over your portrayal of jesminda it’s too perfect). then @separatist-apologist and @crazy-ache with their legendary elucien works!!! i feel like lots of authors inspire me, and the list will be too long if i keep going, but if i’ve ever read something, it has instantly inspired me as well!!!!
10. Who is a new author you discovered?
new to me because i still feel like i’m new around here LOL but @dusk-muse is just SO talented, and @jon-snows-man-bun has such a unique and interesting take on the hewn city (it’s perfect). @avabrynne is INSPIRATIONAL just has all the best au ideas and writes so manly wonderful fics!!! also i LOVE @missfckingfortune and @jules-writes-stories and @nocasdatsgay and @lovely-vanserra-sunshine and @cauldronblssd!!! so many amazing authors in the ACOTAR fandom!!!
11. Did you do any collaborations? How did it start?
no collaborations, but that’s mostly just because i’m very shy LOL
12. What accomplishments are you proudest of?
just posting anything at all is what i’m proudest of!!! it’s a big step for me, i like not being completely perceived, but just writing and reading fics and interacting with people on here and ao3 is something i’m glad i’m doing :))
13. What did you learn about writing or creating this year?
that it’s okay to post something that isn’t perfect is probably the biggest one. it’s a huge relief to realise that the people who read what you write know that what you share with them is being done for fun!
14. Any advice you’d like to share with new or aspiring writers?
i have to really think about this one because i truly don’t know LOL my one and only piece of advice is to have fun with what you’re writing because if you are enjoying the process and having a nice time creating the story you want to tell, then that’s a success! taking a break from writing projects is okay, and taking your time with things is okay too!!! and as someone who is super shy, i always try to encourage people to just share!!! the experience has been so fun and i’ve really enjoyed writing this year :))
15. What are your creative goals for 2025?
just to keep writing and to finish AT LEAST one of my wips!!! i like the idea of wrapping things up when i write, i just have trouble executing (i’m working on it tho).
no pressure tags: anyone mentioned and anyone who wants to join!!!
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thelovelylolly · 11 months ago
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Hello, dear! I saw your prompts for Valentine’s Day and if it’s possible I thought about number 3 (“god, you always make me blush so damn much.”) with Billy Hargrove, where he is always flirting with the reader and teasing… And it isn’t relevant but if it’s okay maybe the reader be plus size, since there aren’t many fics with it. I’m terrible at describing things especially in English, so sorry if it’s a little confuse
Thank you 💙
Makin' Me Blush
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Summary: He gets under your skin, but you love it Warnings: reader is described to be curvier, ooc billy bc thats the only way i write him lol Word Count: 602 Notes: good lord i havent written for billy in a WHILE so here we go (i hope u enjoy love <3)
You met Billy on his first day at Hawkins High. He was in one of your classes and sat behind you. Your teacher assigned you to catch him up and help him with the class, and that led to your friendship with him. Though, he toed the line between friends and more.
He constantly teased you and flirted with you, something you tried to brush off. You had learned when you were younger that most boys didn't really like you, usually using you as a bet or prank. You weren't "pretty" like the other girls that would get asked out on dates, and you had come to terms with that.
You were beautiful, you knew that, but you were just meant to be with someone outside of Hawkins.
Billy's flirting didn't really affect you, just making you blush. You always replied with some flirting or a making jab at him.
What you didn't know was Billy really liked you. His flirting wasn't a joke or anything like that. He wanted to be around you, he wanted to hear your voice and laughter, he wanted to be with you. But he couldn't communicate it easily, having grown up in a household that didn't give him good examples of love.
So, he just flirted with you and teased you, hoping that you would catch on.
It took a while, but one day, you and Billy were walking around Hawkins. You didn't have a specific destination, you two just wanted to walk and talk together.
Since you weren't going anywhere special, you threw on your favorite top and jeans with your old converse. You didn't think you looked any different than usual, but to Billy, you looked gorgeous no matter what you were wearing.
As you two walked down the street, Billy saw a car about to pass by you two. He gently put his hands on your waist and moved you around so he was between you and street. It was a sweet yet simple gesture, and had your face heating up.
"God, you always make me blush so damn much," you mumbled, hiding your face in your hands.
"What was that?" He asked. Both of you slowed to a stop and turned to each other.
"Nothing, just...you're always making me blush. Why?" You replied, your hands slipping into your pockets as you looked at your shoes.
"Isn't it obvious?" He tilted your face up with his finger, making you look at him as he leaned in closer. "I really, really like you, sweetheart."
Your eyes widened as a smile pulled at your lips. "You...like me? T-this isn't some joke?"
"Why would I ever joke about this?"
"Well..." You trailed off, hoping he could put two and two together.
"Oh..." He said, his hands going to your sides and running up and down your curves. "They're all dumbasses to pass on a smart, funny, beautiful girl like you."
He leaned in, but you were the one to close the gap. You could feel him smile against your lips as his hands wrapped around to your back, pulling you closer. You arms wrapped around his neck, one of your hands getting lost in his curls. You couldn't think of anything else in that moment, only how good of a kisser Billy Hargrove was.
When you pulled away, you two were breathless. Still, Billy smiled at you and, if you already weren't blushing enough, you nearly melted under his love filled gaze.
"You're cute when you blush," he said.
You breathlessly laughed, a smile settling on your face.
"I hope you keep making me blush, then."
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sleepingdeath-light · 11 months ago
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yandere hcs + s/o who is okay with his behaviour hcs ; emmet
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requested by ; anonymous (17/07/23)
fandom(s) ; pokèmon
fandom masterlist(s) ; here
character(s) ; emmet
outline ; “I NEED YANDERE EMMET PLEASE RAAAAGH!!! 😭‼️ (and an s/o who’s ok with it because they take it as “awwww he loves me” but they don’t understand that this man is at “I’d kill Arceus for you” levels of love 😂)”
note ; this isn’t as overtly yandere as some of my other posts, but i can’t see emmet going the whole way and slaughtering people for his s/o so much as he just gets a bit obsessive over them (also i haven’t written for him in a while so apologies if this is a bit shaky lol)
warning(s) ; yandere!emmet, obsessive behaviour, possessive behaviour, unhealthy dynamic
emmet had always been a peculiar character in your eyes, even before the two of you became an item, so you never really thought to question some of his more outlandish behaviours when it came to your relationship
his possessive streak and obsession with you were, to you at least, as normal as his unwavering grin or his repetition of ‘i am emmet’ whenever he was speaking to someone — they were just another part of him that you accepted as any loving partner would
(it’s also not the most obvious to others unless they know him extremely well, such as his brother or their mutual best friend, and even then he typically just dismisses their concerns and goes back to being his energetic, ever-smiling set without ever really addressing how different he gets around you)
he still talks about you as his partner to anyone who will listen — and even to those who are very obviously not paying any attention to a word he’s saying — but his remarks take on a much darker and more possessive, even obsessive, tone that’s easy to miss if you don’t pay him much mind during battles
for example, he’s made a great many remarks to other trainers about how he’d do anything to keep you safe and by his side — remarks which include him being more than willing to battle, or even outright kill if it came down to that, any legendary (even arceus himself!) that came between the two of you
(a couple of trainers that managed to see the disturbing genuineness underpinning those statements have gone out of their way to find and warn you about your boyfriend’s obsession, but ended up being even more put-off by your response to their worries — that being anything ranging from neutrality, acceptance, or endearment at his ‘love’ for you)
although he’s still as passionate about trains and pokémon as ever, you’ll find him much less likely to talk about himself with you in favour of just sitting and listening to everything you have to say as if it’s the most interesting thing in the world (even if it’s something as objectively mundane as talking about what you almost had for lunch a few days ago) — he’ll interject every now and then with encouragement and questions that range from cute to concerning (e.g. ‘i am emmet. what did you do after that? i am emmet.’ or ‘i am emmet. that sounds very frustrating. would you like me to talk to them for you? i am emmet.’), but still it’s incredibly rare that you’ll get to hear about his day once his obsession with you has truly taken hold
he only ever addresses you by name or as his spouse (husband/wife/partner/whatever your label of choice is) even though you’re not actually married — legal distinctions don’t matter to him and he already knows that you’re the love of his life so he sees no point in waiting for some ceremony to show you off as ‘his’ to the world
before his obsession set in he was already very comfortable with public shows of affection and wasn’t ever embarrassed to do things like link arms with you, peck you on the cheek/lips, or anything else like that around others unless he was actively engaged in a pokémon battle — but now it’s like he’s gone from an eight to an eleven and you’ll never go long, when you’re around him at least, without him touching you in some way
an arm around your waist, pulling you against his side or chest, linking your arms, holding your hand so tightly you fear it may just break, peppering your face with kisses, etc. — all of those displays are common place for the two of you, and he’s even happier when you’re the one initiating and reciprocating (especially if you’re around others as it appeals to that possessive side of him that likes letting others know that you’re not just taken, but that you’re happily and eagerly taken by him, emmet, and nobody else)
he hasn’t yet been given a reason to kill someone for you, and in the moment he may not even go through with it, but he’s certainly offered to do so on multiple occasions whenever you mention someone annoying you, flirting with you, or otherwise making you uncomfortable — he’s also been known to go harsher on trainers that have shown interest in you in battle whenever you visit him at work (partly to show off to you and partly to put them in their place)
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ochrearia · 17 days ago
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Treat's On Me
[Scheduling this for midnight Christmas Day] Happy Secret Santa @cosmogify! Got you on the randomizer. I don't really know if this is anything but I've never written Mic before so I tried. Considered writing for Berry but I had an idea with Mic so that's this. Also I kind of made a little shit up so apologize if that's wrong, I couldn't ask about it without giving away what I was doing lol. Hope you like it Lunar <3
Slight TW for mild talk about eating disorders, I think. It's not really mentioned by name but it's very clearly implied. Heed the warning
BFs in this one-shot: fightin!BF (Mic, Lunar's), Yourself (YS)
“Looks like you and I are now both rocking the big puffy pieces of clothing, huh little man?”
YS didn’t get to hang out with some of the other selves he’d gone to meet as much as, say, the original four he reached out to. But then you could argue that he spent the most time with the first eight as an extension. And honestly after the number ten he’d very quickly lost count of how many there actually fucking were. But that was fine. The more there were, the more likely that he could go pester someone instead of having to be alone. He had to work on that eventually, being calm enough to be on his own, but for now he definitely wasn’t.
Today he had the rarer pleasure to sit around and waste time with Mic. Mikey? YS wasn’t sure, he was probably going to just call him Mic. Or little man, because he had a habit of doing that for all of them. Since so many of them were so much shorter than him. Heh, could use them as armrests. Even when he was sitting.
Okay, maybe that was mean.
“Mine was a gift!” Mic responded happily, tail wagging back and forth to stress the point of his excitement. “Look! Look look look, look it’s got angel wings on the coattails, and rockin’ spikes on the shoulders, and it’s really cool!”
“Yeah, it sure is.” YS agreed, amused. “The wing motif makes sense with how big this thing is on you. They’d drag on the floor if you were any shorter.” Hah, if I still had my wings, and in the hypothetical of you having them, they absolutely would drag on the floor behind you.
“Mean.” Mic pouted, laying himself over the back of the couch where YS was relaxing. “You’re just jealous that mine is cool and flowy and yours isn’t!”
“Literally two different types of clothes we’re talking about here.” YS shook his head, amusement never faltering. “Yours is a jacket. It’s meant to cover, but more loosely obviously. Mine’s a hoodie. When has anyone worn a hoodie that didn’t have the purpose of turning themselves into a snug sack of shit trying to simulate a permanent hug?”
“Is that why you wear it all the time? You want to go all day wearing a hug?” Mic prodded teasingly.
“Ah… well…” Shit, guess he walked right into that one. “Maybe. I dunno. Shit’s dumb. But a bunch of the others pooled together to buy this for me. I think it was a custom commission? I’m not really sure where they got it, none of them ever told me. They just showed up with a gift on any old day and gave it to me, as if I’d done anything to earn it. I don’t really think I did by that point but they insisted. And I didn’t want to be rude and reject it, so, yeah. And now I guess I never take it off. Well, lying, I have to wash it. But that’s besides the point…”
YS paused, catching sight of Mic, who seemed to be completely zoning out with the thousand-yard stare the other was giving him while he talked.
“Shit, I’m rambling on a bit. Sorry, I do that sometimes, just talking because I can. I’m boring you, aren’t I?”
Mic blinked, before shaking his head, his normal energy returning to him. “Nah! That’s nice! Mine was a gift too! Wait, I already said that… but it’s true! Dee and Stacie got it for me! It’s gonna be a team jacket I think!”
YS regarded him curiously. “You think? You don’t actually know? Well, I suppose it’s not surprising that we’re all a bunch of stupid shit airheads…”
“Yeah!”
YS snorted a laugh at how enthusiastic the smaller man was being. Even with when he was arguably being insulting, going head-first into whatever he said. Mic was always full of energy like that, though, from what the taller could tell. Suppose he had to be considering what his own life was like. He didn’t know much yet, but it seemed like he was an avid fighter? Though what kind of fighter he wasn’t really sure of.
“Suppose we also share the whole thing of having big puffy clothes that hide how thin we are.” YS dared to venture after a moment. Was this a good idea? Who knows. But it was something they had in common, and YS would otherwise be grasping at straws trying to find something to talk about.
Mic’s energy visibly lessened, but not by too much that YS would have to fear that he went too far. “Yeah… I have to be like this though. Need to be able to move quickly, have fast reflexes and stuff. And with all of the exercise I get I don’t really get to keep much if that makes sense. Always working off any extra weight!”
That’s not the full truth and we both know it, little man. YS shrugged, knowing it might not be the best to go into full depth about it when he and Mic hadn’t had a lot of time together yet. But it was rarer to meet another self that had no issues than meet another self that had almost the exact same issue he did.
“I don’t really… retain that much either.” YS was dancing around the real word. Of which would be that he didn’t really eat much either. It was harder to tell how skinny YS stayed when his hoodie was always on. Despite it being snug, it made him look more filled out than he actually was. “You kind of just can’t see it all that much with the hoodie. The others are always doing their best to try and get me to eat more, and I know I should, I just… usually never have the energy.”
YS frowned, pausing to keep a watch on how Mic would react. He seemed content to just listen, for now, like he had nothing to say. Or maybe he did have something to say, a lot to say. But he didn’t want to, or didn’t know how. Oh well. Baby steps that could be worked towards later.
“It ends up being a never-ending cycle, though. I’m too tired to bother to eat because I’m depressed and shit, and then I don’t eat enough, and then I really never will have the energy. Tired down to the bones and nothing ever fixes it because I don’t do what I need to when it comes to, well, living. At least, that’s how it was at the start.”
Mic cocked his head to the side, curious. “At the start?”
“Yeah.” YS met his gaze again, trying to convey a bit of a hopeful attitude. “When I was alone. Before I met any of you, dealing with the loss of my girlfriend with no one left. Quite honestly, I don’t really know how I even made it out alive in that period. I don’t even really remember much I did during that, but I know I didn’t take care of myself.”
YS was leaving out the whole… tearing his wings off thing. Mic didn’t really need to know that. No one needed to know that but YS was shit at keeping his mouth shut. Some of them knew. A handful more knew he was an angel. Mic might already know that too, but maybe not.
“But then I started. Meeting my other selves, yknow? And they… care a lot about me, which I don’t know why they would, but they do. And they’ve noticed my bad habits. Started making their own habits to try and balance them out. Some of them are entirely blunt with it, outright stating they’re going to kick my ass if I don’t eat something. Some are indirect. Leaving me with extra leftovers they suddenly don’t want anymore, or showing up with stuff because they ‘bought too much’ and thought I might want it.”
This probably wouldn’t do much. He was rambling too much about shit that Mic probably didn’t even want to talk about to be honest. Stuff like this sometimes could hit a nerve that no one wanted to be irritated. Knowing that what you were doing was bad, and doing it anyway, because you felt like you had to or just couldn’t break the habit once you were in it.
“You know what?” YS strayed off suddenly, deciding that this approach might not do anything substantial. “What do you say you and I go out and get some of the most ridiculous fast food we can find? Don’t worry about not knowing the city here, I know it enough. We could go around to whatever we can find and see if they have anything disgusting enough to buy. It’ll be on me. How’s that sound?”
Both of them could use a meal, to be honest. Might not end up being at all healthy, but sometimes food was food. Anything to fill an empty stomach was better than nothing. And it could be made into a game. YS just hoped Mic would play along. 
Mic’s energy sprouted back to life. “Exploring out in your world? Ooo, sounds fun, sounds fun! Let’s go do that! I want to see how different everything is compared to mine!”
Well, at least he managed to turn it around. That was good. YS just hoped that when the time came he could convince the smaller to sit down with him and pig out on whatever the fuck they could find. Maybe if YS showed that he could eat, then Mic would decide he could also eat.
YS grinned at him, placing a hand on his head and ruffling, making sure to avoid the halo. “Alright, little man, try not to implode with excitement. Let’s go fuck around and shit. But we can’t stay out in the open for too long while it’s this cold or I’ll turn into a giant freaky popsicle.”
“Can’t take the cold huh? Your fault for being so tall, you have more surface area that can get cold, unlike me! Hah! A benefit to being small!” Mic teased, practically bouncing off the walls while YS got up from his lounging.
“Ha ha, very funny. Even if I use my shapeshifting to get smaller I still can’t take the cold all that well. Another reason I’m always wearing this stupid hoodie.”
You’re certainly not helping yourself with the cold by leaving yourself so thin either, YS. How painfully self-aware are you going to get before you start doing something about it, huh?
YS sighed, stopping right before the front door. Mic almost ran into him from behind, not expecting the sudden pause. The smaller peered at him curiously.
“This year’s almost over, you know?” YS mumbled, rubbing his thumb against his hand. “Not too much left in it to do much of a change at all. The whole New Year’s tradition of making a goal is corny as fuck, but, yknow, maybe there’s something to it if you make a real promise.”
Mic tilted his head again. Curiosity was a big trait of this self, it seemed. “But it’s not New Year’s yet. Isn’t it bad to share your resolution before it’s here?”
“I think you’re mixing that up with birthday wishes.” YS grinned, rolling his eyes fondly. “But you have a point. It’s not New Year’s yet. I still think it would be nice to maybe come up with something while we’re out. And then we can maybe make promises to each other to try and hold to what we want to do next year. Does that sound fun?”
“Oooh, yeah, yeah! And then whoever fails on their resolution first has to do a forfeit!” Mic replied, grinning mischievously.
“A forfeit within reason, sure.” YS agreed after a moment. “Guess we have a lot to discuss then. Come on, let’s go before the sun gets any lower.”
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radi0gh4stxd · 20 days ago
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Au infodump post!!
I feel like I’ve wrote enough about this au to now, like, post about it?? I don’t know, but I think writing it out might help me to fill stuff in lol.
I don’t think this will be a long post, but I intend to yap a little so yeah-
Habromania Au!
Yes, I’ve finally got a name for it, but longer than I wanted it be called but eh, it’s whatever. Fun fact: the word means, ‘Delusions of Happiness’, and I think that fits the premise of my au as well as it can right now.
Now, onto the actual Au.
So, this au focuses a little more on my favourite little guy, Raffs!! He was given the short stick in the Og game, so I’d thought I���d let him shine a little in this au!
Don’t worry, Caz is still around and is just as important, but I’m not confident in my ability to write him yet, so for now, Raffs is our main guy!
Everything leading up to the drilling stays the same, except in this, Raffs isn’t the one going into the dive bell, it’s Brodie. Why?? Because one) I needed a reason for Raffs to not be infected and two) I wanted Brodie to be an infected in my au. So, basically Brodie decides that, to soothe the boys anxiety, to go first to just show him that all is fine, and that he’s safe.
And then the drill happens. And The Shape wakes up. This stays the same. Caz and Gregor still fall, except, I decide to be nice and decide that Gregor also gets to live, so Raffs and Douglas pull those two out, help them and that jazz. Douglas and Gregor stay with the diving bell, and Caz and Raffs go down and investigate, like in the game.
They find Gibbo, not infected, but rightfully scared. Finlay is also here, but she isn’t too well, instead of Gibbo getting the stuff in him, it’s her. But she swears she’s fine, that it didn’t hit her skin or whatever. So now, the group makes their way to accommodations, where Roy, Trots, Archie and possibly, again im making this up as I go, O’Connor are. They talk, discuss what the hell is happening and are later joined by Douglas and Gregor.
Archie is Very happy to see Gregor alive :)
Raff’s quick to ask where Brodie is, because you know, if they’re here, then where’s Brodie?? And the two explain that, well, Brodie went to look for him. But he wasn’t right, something was definitely wrong with him. But he was gone before they could ask anything.
So, now they have to go round the rig, searching for the others. And the shape stuff still happens, infected still try and fuck them over yadda yadda-
Now not everything written here is set in stone, but most is. This is me just kinda word vomiting and hoping it makes sense.
Now, the Shape and the infection and infected.
As already seen, some of the og infected aren’t infected here, while some who weren’t infected are. Thats only a few characters, most of the og infected are infected here too.
The infection is different in this au. It’s mostly mental, but physical traits still appear, but it mostly stays in its origin spot of infection, unless said person has more than origin spot of infection <3
Think of this like, a mashed up version of those mlp infected videos, the infection from hollow knight and the mold from resi 7. I’ve taken bits and pieces of what I like about them and just- threw them in a blender.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
^^^
These are like, shoddy, sketched renditions of what I mean by the , ‘physical’ effects. The one on the left is Muir, and the one the right is Brodie. Not the best but I tried-
Now, I did change some things about the Shape for this au, and how it affects the crew, but I might, and by might I probably will, make a separate post for that.
As for now, that’s all I’ve got for this au. But yeah! Fun! If you have any questions about this au, I’ll try and answer them best I can, but I’ll warn you, I’m not to great at it. So if it comes off a bit awkward, that’s why<3
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sam-is-my-safe-word · 8 months ago
Text
Demon Dreams
Demon!Dean Winchester x Jensen Ackles
Rating: Explicit
Tags: Non- AU, Alternate Universe - No Girlfriends/No Wives, Season/Series 10, Character Bleed, Jensen Is Not Okay, Jared is Jared, Jared Is Worried About Jensen, Demon Dean Winchester, Demon Dean Is An Asshole, Emotional Manipulation, Identity Crisis, Possession, Sort of? - Freeform, Wet Dreams, Oral Sex, Rough Oral Sex, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Strangulation, Exorcisms, Sexorcism If You Will,
Word Count: 3,201
Summary: Jensen is no stranger to character bleed. But it's not meant to take over your life like this, right?
Notes:
I'm participating in @jacklesversebingo and this part will fill my "you fed my demons" "you created mine" square.
Okay, this is the most fictional thing I've ever written lol. This is an utterly fictional Jensen set in an AU with no wives or children. I am not implying for one single second that anything in this fic actually occured. Nor am I implying Jensen is gay or bisexual. Please don't sue me lol. Also, first time writing RPF/RPS. Still feel some kinda way about it. Be gentle with me (even though I am not gentle with you, my dear readers)
Endless thanks to my beta @runawaydr3amerao3 for all her help in making this so much better than I could have & for her comma wrangling <3 Endless thanks also to @talltalesandbedtimestories for getting me involved in this whole bingo thing & cheering me on <3
Jensen is no stranger to character bleed. It’s happened before. Some characters are just too heavy. 
It’s happened with Dean a few times. Hard scenes that invade his dreams for days afterwards. Character arcs that refuse to leave when he sheds Dean to put Jensen back on and leave him snapping at everyone. 
This is different, though. This is like the character has taken on a life of its own in his head. 
Jensen is no stranger to sex dreams either. He’s a healthy guy in his mid-thirties with no long-term partner and a job that takes up almost all his life. 
Jerking off at 3am because he woke up hard from a dream of some faceless someone riding him like a mechanical bull, and his alarm is going to go off in just over an hour and he’d really like to sleep a little more and sleep won’t happen until he deals with his cock, is just another part of life. 
This is different as well. This isn’t a faceless stranger. He knows the person haunting his dreams. 
Intimately. 
Jensen has dreamed about Dean lots of times. He’s an old friend. 
This is not his Dean. 
~~~
Demon Dean was a challenge. He started out fun to play, a nice mix-up. A chance for extended scenes with Mark, to let out Dean’s inner asshole. A sex scene - awkward - and a fight scene - awesome. The black contacts weren’t fun but overall it was a good time. 
Up until filming the third episode, when he had to act against Jared again, and suddenly Demon Dean wasn’t fun anymore. Then it was hard. Then it was fighting against every acting instinct that came with ten years of Dean, ten years with Jared. 
Not Dean, Sam’s brother anymore; Demon Dean, Sam’s enemy. It was a hard headspace to get into. Chasing Jared around the bunker with a hammer was brutal. He couldn’t even truly lose himself in the character because he still had to direct everyone else. 
Then it was over. Just three episodes and he was free to lose the murder shirt and style his hair properly again. 
And he’s proud of his work. Especially ‘Soul Survivor’. It’s always a challenge to balance actor and director, but he’s thrilled with how it turned out. He made Demon Dean a true threat to Sam, and as long as he doesn’t examine that too closely, it’s okay. 
But it’s been a couple of weeks since they finished ‘Soul Survivor’, and Jensen is still waking up sweating after dreams about black eyes and the words ‘do it’ ringing in his ears. 
~~~
Look, Jensen is a perfectly sane guy. He has a great handle on his mental health, knows the signs of when he needs to reach out. Hell, after ten years of helping Jared, Jensen would say he probably knows more about mental health than most people who don’t actually suffer with mental health problems. 
So while he knows that his dreams of weapons, black eyes and the thrill of the chase are just character bleed, he also knows that he needs to be aware in case they develop into something serious. 
But nothing he knows tells him what to do when he starts to look forward to his dark dreams. 
Jared might be able to help, though. 
So a few days later, when he wakes up hard and aching after dreaming about Demon Dean fucking his throat raw - all while holding a knife to it - after he’s taken care of the problem, he texts Jared - once he’s washed his hands, of course. 
It’s still early, but Jared gets up hours before he needs to, to work out and walk his dogs and generally become a person. A far cry from Jensen, who falls out of bed after four snoozes of his alarm and downs coffee until his eyes open. 
Jensen: You up?
Jared: Yeah, lol. Why are YOU up?
Jensen: Can’t sleep. Can I ask you something? 
There’s a pause and Jensen thinks maybe Jared’s sitting down or something. No one asks to talk at 3:30am. He isn’t expecting the phone to ring in his hand. 
“‘Lo.” 
“You okay? Not like you to be up at this time, never mind asking if you can ask me something.” 
This is exactly what Jensen didn’t want. Now he has to try and explain himself with words instead of text. 
“I’m okay. Just… Do you even dream about Sam?” 
Jared lets out a small laugh; Jensen can hear the relief. 
“All the time, man. All the fucking time. You don’t dream about Dean?” 
“Yeah, I do. I mean… like, weird dreams about Sam?” 
Jared hums. 
“I had a recurring dream that he kept showing up to my high school graduation and glaring at me. Like I was an asshole for finishing school, y’know.” 
Jared chuckles.
“Or when I’ve gone a little too hard on the candy and there’s Sam, staring at me from across a table with a pile of salad in front of him. Like, okay, dude. You’re a health nut, I’m not. That kind of weird?”
God help Jensen, Jared is going to make him spell it out. 
“Not exactly…” 
Jared must hear something in his voice because he starts to laugh, far too loudly for the time of day. 
“Ohhhh… that kind of weird. Jackles, you pervert, you.” 
This was a terrible idea, why did he even message Jared? He’ll never live this down now.
“No, not like- I mean, that kind of weird but not… Stop fucking laughing, Jared.” 
Jared has gone from laughing to belly laughing; Jensen can hear him fighting for breath. 
“I’m sorry...”
“You’re not.” 
“No, I’m not. This is too funny. Hollywood hot-shot Jensen Ackles all in knots at 3am because he had a wet dream-” 
“I fucking DID NOT!” 
He did, though, night after night. 
“Why are you blushing then?” 
“I’m no-” 
Damnit, he is. He can feel his cheeks heating up. 
“It wasn’t a wet fucking dream, Jared. I’m not thirteen, for chrissakes. It was just a weird dream and it kinda freaked me out.” 
“A weird sex dream, you mean.” 
“Yes.” 
Jared is still laughing but it’s starting to die down now. 
“Okay, calm down. Yes, I dream about Sam. Yes, sometimes they’re weird. Yes, sometimes they’re sex-dreams-weird. Hell, I dream about fucking Sam more than I dream about fucking anyone else.” 
Jared sounds perfectly at peace with this revelation, and if it was regular Dean that Jensen was dreaming about, he might get it. 
“I mean, it’s either dream about fucking Sam or dream about fucking you . I’ll take Sam any day.” 
Jared starts fake gagging and Jensen is over this entire conversation. 
“Okay, good talk. Thanks, Jared. I’ll see you in a little while. Let’s just forget this ever happened.” 
“Wait. You know I’m only messin’ with you. You can talk-” 
*Click*
Well, that was a waste of time. Jared sounded sincere at the end, but Jensen is too embarrassed to even try to talk now. Hopefully by the time he has to face Jared in the car, Jared will have found something else to talk about. 
~~~
Jared was smart enough not to bring up the early morning phone call, and after a brief hug and a nod, they were all good. 
Demon Dean, though? He’s dining out on the call, milking Jensen’s embarrassment for all it’s worth. 
It’s a special kind of humiliation when someone is three fingers deep in your ass and you’re moaning like a whore, and they bring up an awkward 3am call you had with your best friend a few days ago. 
“So you think this is weird, huh?” 
Jensen never doubted Dean’s swagger was well earned, but Demon Dean turns it up to eleven. Jensen hasn’t come this hard since he was a teen, and it’s part of the reason he looks forward to these damn dreams, even though they freak him the fuck out. 
“‘Cause you sure seem to like it.” 
Demon Dean twists his fingers and Jensen howls.  
“You like being here, at my mercy. You like when it hurts, when you’re scared. When I take it.” 
Jensen’s hips buck. God, he’s so close. 
“This is where you should be. That pretty face needs to be sucking cock or face down in the sheets.” 
Jensen isn’t eighteen anymore, he’s not new to the scene and insecure about himself. He knows he’s a good actor, a good director, a fucking professional. But something about Demon Dean cuts through all that and suddenly he’s a kid again, doubting everything. It makes him even harder. The pitch black eyes and the waves of menace rolling off Demon Dean make Jensen legitimately scared of him, even though he knows it’s just a dream. 
“Does it feel weird , Jensen?” 
Jensen can only moan in response. It’s so fucking good. 
“Answer me!” 
There’s the cold and heavy weight of a hammer pressing into his Adam's apple, and when Jensen opens his eyes, Demon Dean’s own ice black is all he can see. 
“N…no.” 
He’s rewarded for his answer by a hard thrust in and upwards. He’s right there, he can taste it. 
“N…no.” 
Demon Dean mocks him. 
“No, it doesn’t look like it, either. Looks like you’re having a blast. Cunt so tight around my fingers. Looks like you’re right where you should be.”
Jensen can’t breathe. 
“Say it. Say you feel right here, cunt stuffed full of me.” 
“I…”
“Say it, Jensen. Or I’ll stop.” 
“Fuck. Fuck… I feel right.” 
“That’s it. This is what you’re good for, isn't it? Just a pretty boy to get fucked.” 
“Ju-just a pretty boy to get fucked. Fucking… please!” 
Demon Dean smiles coldly. 
Jensen wakes with a groan, hips still thrusting into the mattress as he soaks the sheets.
More laundry. He should buy more sheet sets. 
~~~
Jared pulls Jensen aside a couple of weeks after the call. They’re out with some cast and crew from that week's episode, just relaxing, having some drinks and blowing off steam after a difficult shoot. 
Jensen really doesn’t want to be there, doesn’t want to be anywhere, really. But he couldn’t refuse, not without prompting more questions. So he paints on a smile, sticks to beer and tries to let the conversations happen around him without getting involved. 
Jared must notice his discomfort and grabs him on a trip to the bathroom. 
“You alright, dude?” 
Jensen sighs internally. He doesn’t want to do this. 
“I’m fine, just tired, y’know.” 
Jared cocks his head a little; looks at Jensen too closely. 
“You wanna get out of here? I’ll split an Uber with you?” 
God yes. But then it will be questions on Monday and he can’t with that. 
“No, I’m good. Besides, you’re having a good time. You don’t gotta leave on account of my old ass.” 
Another head tilt, Jared really can be a puppy at times. Normally, Jensen adores this caring side of his friend. But he’d give anything to have that focus aimed away from him right now. 
“Jen…” 
“I’m fine! Okay. I’m fucking tired, it’s been a long week. Let’s just… get another drink or something. Okay?” 
Jensen didn’t mean for Dean to come out of his mouth then. It happens, but not usually in temper like that. Jared holds his hands up in surrender and lets Jensen walk past him, back to their group. 
~~~
He’s on his knees, Demon Dean’s cock buried in his throat. It hurts, he can’t breathe, but it feels so good. 
“Fuck, that’s it. Choke on it. Gonna get that throat all fucked out.” 
Jensen moans and digs his fingers into Demon Dean’s hips. 
“Gotta help you find Dean’s voice somehow. Know you’ve been having trouble with that.” 
Demon Dean runs a hand through his hair as he says it and Jensen forgets to be offended.
“That’s it. That’s it. Pretty mouth on my cock. Just like it should be.”
~~~
Something isn’t right with Jensen. Everyone can see it. He’s just not present anymore. Not totally at least. He gives it his best on set, but he just can’t seem to find the right headspace anymore. Scenes that he would knock out in two takes, max., are taking six/seven/eight now. 
Jared is beside himself with worry. 
“Jensen, please. If you won’t talk to me, talk to someone, anyone. Please!”
“I’m fine, Jay.” 
Weary smile. Tired eyes. 
“Jensen. Is this about those dreams you were having?” 
“No! Of course not. Anyway, I’ll see you in the morning.” 
“Jen…” 
“Night, Jared.” 
~~~
“I should just keep you here, Jensen. In your mind with me, all the time. Think how good it would be, nothing to worry about. Just pleasing me.” 
“Please…” 
“So fuckin’ pretty. Made to be laid out on silk sheets and just fucked . Over and over and over. This is where you should be.” 
“Fuck…” 
“Too much pressure out there. Acting, directing, managing your life. Wouldn’t you rather stay here, just us?” 
“Yes. Fuck yes. With you.” 
~~~
It comes to a head during the filming of ‘The Executioner’s Song’. An absolutely pivotal moment for Dean, and Jensen just cannot get his head in the game. Everyone is frustrated, including Jensen. 
But as always, it’s Jared that breaks the spell in the end. 
“C’mon, dude. Get it together. I’m sick of redoing this scene.” 
It’s said with humour, but Jensen can hear the tension and frustration underneath. 
The words spill out of him, without thought.
“I think I’m gonna quit…” 
Jared just looks at him, slack-jawed. There’s silence for a minute. Thankfully they’re in a quiet corner of the set while the crew resets the equipment… again. 
“What?” 
It’s said so softly, Jensen almost doesn’t hear it. 
“I think… I’m not cut out for this. I should quit. This isn’t what I should be doing.”
Jensen says it calmly, as if he’s pondering what to have for lunch. But when he looks at Jared again, he’s floored by what he sees.
Jared is crying. His eyes are full of tears, one is tracing its way down his cheek. He’s clenching his jaw, but Jensen can see the wobble. Jensen is reminded of filming ‘All Hell Breaks Loose Part II’, wiping away the stray tear that fell as Dean mourned Sam. 
It’s like the fog lifts from Jensen’s eyes. He realises what he just said. 
“Jared…” 
He reaches out to touch his friend, but Jared turns and walks away without a word. 
Jensen just watches, unable to move, as Jared goes to the crew and tells them he needs to go home. The director tries to beg Jared to stay, saying they’re already so behind schedule - a glance in Jensen’s direction at that. Jared is unmoved, though. Jensen hears him say that even if ‘he’ - meaning Jensen again, of course - can get it together, they won’t get anything usable from him today, and he’ll be back on set bright and early tomorrow to get it done. 
Shame, hot and sick, fills Jensen. What has he done… 
Jared has already left by the time Jensen gets his things together. The car that usually drives them both to and from set is waiting for him, though. Jared had said he was going to make his own way home. No one wanted to argue. 
The ride home for Jensen is smothered in thick silence. Not even a goodbye is exchanged with the driver when they pull up outside Jensen’s apartment building. 
What has he done…
What has he let himself become? 
He spends the evening drinking bourbon from the bottle and stopping himself from calling Jared. Even with the early finish, it’s still late - by normal standards - and he’s tired from the day. The bourbon speeds the process along and it’s not long before his head is hitting the pillow. 
Jensen is well into the dream before he realises this is one. It’s almost like lucid dreaming, these nightly visits with Demon Dean. But he’s never tried to control them, just takes what Demon Dean gives to him. 
Tonight, though, tonight he sees through the veil. So to speak. 
Demon Dean is above him, watching him with those blank, black eyes and that cold smile, distorted by the grimace of effort he’s putting into fucking Jensen as hard as he can. He’s got two fingers buried in Jensen’s mouth at the same time and he’s spouting the usual shit, but this time, Jensen knows it’s shit. 
“God, wish I could fuck your mouth and cunt at the same time. Both so fucking tight and pretty.” 
He thrusts deeply and Jensen groans around the fingers before spitting them out in disgust. Demon Dean doesn’t seem to notice. 
“Fuckin’ perfect here, right where you’re meant to be, getting this tight hole fucked sloppy. Just what you’re good for.” 
Jensen snaps, or breaks free. He’s not sure. 
With a roar of anger, he bucks his hips upwards, uses the momentum to shove Demon Dean over onto his back. Jensen goes with him, ends up straddling his waist, feeling Demon Dean’s hard cock resting against his ass, no longer inside him. 
With the demon beneath him, Jensen raises a fist to punch him, break his nose, his cheekbone, his jaw, anything. But those depthless black eyes and that cold fucking smirk stop him. Demon Dean would welcome the violence. Jensen is not a violent man, not unless he has to be. 
He has to be here. Has to take back control in the only way Demon Dean understands. 
He wraps his hand around the throat beneath him, squeezes just a little. Just to test. 
“You fed my demons long enough. No more.” 
The laugh that comes from below him is a little strained, a little wheezy. Jensen brings his other hand up, wraps them both around Demon Dean's neck, thumbs crossing over the Adam's apple. 
“Fed your demons? Jensen, you created mine.” 
Jensen squeezes. Hard. Tight. His arms shake with the effort. The face beneath him goes red, then purple. But the body never fights to break free. The hips under him squirm and thrust. 
Tighter. 
Harder. 
Jensen is sure something is going to pop, unsure if it will be him. 
Right as his arms are about to go limp, unable to hold the tension anymore, he feels the cock behind him twitch, kick and then shoot hot over his ass. When he looks into the face under him, the eyes appear to roll back. 
But instead they just morph to green, the same green eyes he’s seen in the mirror every day of his life. 
His hands fall from his own throat and the body under him takes a deep breath. 
Not Demon Dean anymore, only Jensen. 
Jensen wakes with a shout, his hips churning into the sheets and mattress below him, cock still spurting cum into his boxers. 
He’s soaked in sweat and when he realises what woke him - strangling Demon Dean and watching him morph back into Jensen - he feels new cold sweat break out all over him. 
Is it over? Is he free from Demon Dean’s spell? 
He needs to call Jared… 
But first, where did he put those new sheets?
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